The King's Bride

My "Love Dare" For You

2012-02-14T08:16:00.000-08:00

Those of you who have seen the movie, Fireproof, may have recognized the title. In that movie, Caleb, on the brink of divorce, is given a "dare" by his father. The dare shows Caleb what marriage is and, ultimately, leads him to the Cross on the way.

Well today is Valentine's Day and, as I type this, I am watching the Tweets and the Facebook posts from people all over. They are posting about flowers, candy, date nights, love letters, their significant others...or their "woes" about being single on this "lover's holiday." On my personal blog, I posted the other day that Valentine's Day has a pretty rotten origin. And as a Christian, sometimes it's not so simple to know exactly how you ought to respond. My husband and I talked about it again this morning. We don't want to be legalistic but we do want to live righteously. With that being said, I have my own little "Love Dare" for you today. Actually....I have two. :)

If you are single...

I dare you to draw nigh unto God...(James 4:8)

I dare you to trust in Him, with ALL your heart...(Proverbs 3:5)

I dare you to let Him show you how to love...(1 Corinthians 13:4-8; John 13:5)

I dare you to see HOW MUCH in love He is with you!....(Jeremiah 31:3; Hosea 2:19-20; Romans 8:38-39)

I dare you to walk in wisdom, in love, and in purity....(Colossians 4:5; Ephesians 5:2; Matthew 5:8)

I dare you to let Him lead you in everything...(Proverbs 3:6)

If you are married...

I dare you to love each other as Christ loves you...(1 John 4:7)

I dare you to put one another above yourself....(Philippians 2:3)

I dare you (wives) to be your husband's help meet....(Genesis 2:18, Titus 2:3-5, Proverbs 31:10-30)

I dare you (husbands) to be your wife's protector and leader...(Ephesians 5:23-29)

I dare you to be kind, patient, and servant hearted with one another...(Galatians 5:13; Galatians 5:22-25)

I dare you to let God build your life, your marriage, and your family...(Psalm 127:1-5)


On this "day for lovers," I challenge you to fall more in love with our Lord and Savior. Because if HE is the all-complete lover of our souls, then all else will fall into place and into perspective.

Searching For True Love

2012-01-21T08:40:00.000-08:00

Are you searching for true love?...

Our Wedding VIDEO

2011-12-12T11:17:00.000-08:00

I realized the other day that I never posted the video of our wedding. Well, better late than never.

While uploading the video, it was a sweet moment, looking back to my wedding. I can't believe it has been one year and eight months since that day.

I hope, if you take the time to watch our video, that you will see the Lord Jesus, the great Author of Love, all throughout the ceremony.

Excerpts from "I Kissed Dating Goodbye"

2011-12-08T11:46:00.000-08:00

Choosing to quit the dating game doesn’t mean rejecting friendship with the opposite sex, companionship, romance, or marriage. We can still pursue those things, we just choose to pursue them on God’s terms and in his time.

Some people who hear about my decision not to date till I'm ready for marriage assume that my heart must've broken. No, my heart was made new by my Savior...Having a girlfriend was no longer my greatest need. Knowing and obeying him was.

True love isn't just expressed in passionately whispered words or an intimate kiss or embrace, before two people are married, love is expressed in self-control, patience, even words left unsaid.

Deepening intimacy without defining a level of commitment is dangerous. It's like going mountain climbing with a partner who isn't sure she wants the responsibility of holding your rope. When you've climbed two thousand feet up a mountain face, you don't want to have a conversation about how she feels 'Tied down' by your relationship.

....dating is a product of our entertainment driven, disposable-everything American culture.

One of the saddest tendencies of dating is to distract young adults from developing their God-given abilities and skills.

God gives us singleness---a season of our lives unmatched in its boundless opportunities for growth, learning, and service...
We each have a ‘room’ containing all our sinful deeds and thoughts. But just because we admit this or feel bad about it doesn’t mean we’re forgiven. Remorse can’t save anyone. Only faith in Christ can. Only trust in His death and resurrection for us.

The human heart doesn’t like taking orders from the mind. The time will come for all of us when we won’t feel we’re doing the godly, responsible thing we’re resolved to do.

The question is not merely, “Are you and a potential spouse saved?” but rather, “Are both of you in love with Jesus Christ? Will you place Him even before each other?”

And because I’ve experienced it – because Jesus died for me – I’m committed to a love life that is controlled by Him. I invite you along. In the light of the love He’s given us, let’s make purity and blamelessness our priority.

The Marriage Prayer

2011-11-30T06:56:00.000-08:00

Heavenly Love Stories: Adam & Paige || pt 2

2011-11-03T10:21:00.000-07:00

Adam and Paige | pt 2

http://ifmypeople.wordpress.com/

April 14, 2007

As told by Adam:

In 1965, The Beatles performed the song, “All You Need Is Love” on a live global television link that was watched by 400 million people in 26 countries.

Isn’t that sweet. “All we need is love.” Don’t you hear that all the time? What is it that is lifted up at weddings everyday? Love. Right? Sure, because…that’s all you need…right? WRONG!!!

John Lennon was flat-out wrong. Their statement, which has been more than embraced by our culture is in complete contradiction to the word of God. You can thank The Beatles for the sixties “love and peace” garbage. We saw how that one worked out. The truth is, though they meant to say it or not, The Beatles were declaring that you don’t need God to have peace. You just need love. Well, I would submit to you that you can have neither one without first having Christ!

Ecclesiastes 4:12 says, “And if one prevail against him, two shall withstand him; and a threefold cord is not quickly broken.” I wish it would become a requirement for this verse to be expounded upon at every wedding. You see, we have bought into Hollywood’s version of love. You know, the one where Cupid shoots you with an arrow and all of the sudden you “fall in love.” Well, I’ve got news for you. If you can “fall in love”, you can “fall right out of love.” Love alone won’t cut it when the going gets tough. That’s why we need Christ as the centerpiece. Period.

Why have I started in this way? Because you need to understand that, though Paige and I are madly in love with each other, it was not our love that brought us together. Nor, is it our love that is keeping us together. It’s the Third Cord. When you read Paige’s story of how she was led to me, it is easy to think, “Awww…how sweet…the two little love birds.” But if that’s how you read it, you missed something. You see, though Paige and I have travelled completely different paths, there is one thing we have perfectly in common. Both of us fully surrendered our lives to God…especially our love lives.

Many girls reach an age when they decide they are ready to pursue the opposite sex, so they do so. Despite the cultural norm, Paige did something completely different. She committed herself to God and to praying for her future husband. She was putting her trust in God; that He would do what was right. Praise God that He did.

As Paige said in her article, I had never met her when she committed to praying for me. So, it was January 3, 2004 that she made this commitment. I can honestly say, that the year of 2004 was life changing for me.

On February 24th of that year, “The Passion Of The Christ” was released. In January of that year, my roommate at the time convinced me to go watch this movie with him. I was a big “Braveheart” fan, so I figured it would be good. He also talked me into reading the passion account from each of the four gospels.

I not only read that, but after watching the movie, I continued to read God’s Word. It wasn’t every night, but I read it pretty often. I knew there was something to this book. The movie had really opened my eyes and I no longer viewed Christians in the negative light that I had in the past. Oh, I knew that because they were emotional, didn’t dictate truth. But, I knew I had better check into it for myself.

Over the next year, God used several key things to open my eyes to the fact that I was lost in my sin and my only hope was Christ. Finally, in February of 2005, I crawled to the foot of a blood-stained cross and surrendered. Jesus saved me.

It wasn’t long after that that I met Paige. The first time we met, we shook hands and greeted each other and that was it. I hardly had the time to put much thought into it, but I knew something was different about this young lady. And, though she truly is the most beautiful woman in the world, it wasn’t her outward beauty that attracted me to her. It was her walk with Christ.

Over the next few months, we became good friends. I really needed a good friend at this point because, though I had been saved, I was still struggling with my sin. And I was fighting for my life with a ten-year-old drug addiction. I am so thankful that she did not let me know how she felt about me. Because, had we gotten involved at this period in my life, the outcome would have been devastating.

Then comes August 19, 2005. That night, as I was in a prayer meeting, I realized that I could not win my fight against my addictions. So I threw my hands up and gave it to God. That might sound trite to you, but that’s what I did. You see, I didn’t understand that God was the kind of God that overcomes sin. That night, I realized that my sin was not only hurting me and others. My sin was hurting God.

I truly surrendered all of my life to Him that night, and He truly set me free. The next day, I had to drive down to South Carolina for my step-brother’s wedding. I was so full of the Holy Spirit, I could hardly contain myself. It was on that trip, that God showed me that Paige would be my wife. He also, clearly showed me that I was not ready yet. As I was praying in my car, I realized that the only way a relationship with Paige would ever work is if I had the right relationship with Christ.

On the way back, I still remember buying Paige a little package of fireworks. That was the first thing I ever bought her. I was so excited to give them to her. I know…that’s cheezy, but I really enjoy giving things to her and I knew that she loved fireworks.

So, that was August of 2005. Over the next four months, God took me on quite a journey. I’ll make this brief. In October, I lost my job. I was designing shirts with alcohol on them and I knew I could no longer do that. When I told that to my boss, he fired me. Well, I had a new job (my current job) the next day. Let’s just say that God definitely blessed me on that one.

Before starting this new job, I went on my first pro-life mission trip to Wichita, KS with Operation Save America. I followed men of God like Flip Benham and Scott Heldreth down there and met up with saints like Mark Hollick, Rusty Thomas and John Reyes. Those are some special people.

I remember calling Paige from Wichita, telling her that revival had broken out. One of the high schools that we had shared the gospel to, came to our church that Sunday to protest us. Many of them got saved that morning.

On the way back, I spent a week helping Hurricane Katrina an Rita victims in Texas and Louisiana. That was pretty fun too.

It was trips like this, along with going to the abortion clinic with Flip, that caused me to grow leaps and bounds. Well, that and a heavy dose of daily Bible reading.

Finally, in December of 2005, I got clearance from God that I was ready to pursue Paige. Now, this was no audible voice or anything. I just felt the peace that I had His blessing.

So, the first thing I did was call my youth pastor. He and I were pretty close at the time and he knew that I wanted to do things right with Paige. I had listened to quite a few sermons on purity and I was fully convinced that God has a particular way in which he wants us to go about pursuing the opposite sex.

I asked Pastor Mark Miles if he thought I was ready and he said “yes.” After that, my plan was to talk with Paige’s father, Allen, one night at church. I didn’t have the chance to talk to him alone, so I decided to put it off until next week.

There is no telling how long I would have put it off. Though Allen is a really nice guy, I was still very nervous about talking to him. Finally, something happened that, as Paige said, lit a fire under my tail.

I saw another guy going after her, so I called Allen that night. Yes, I wish I had talked with him face to face, but like Paige said, we didn’t do everything perfectly.

So I called Allen and told him that I would like to pursue a future with his daughter. He gave me the green light, so I asked Paige the next day. Obviously, she said, “yes.”

Like Paige said in her article, we were learning as we went. I had listened to many sermons on purity. I first heard the idea of not kissing until marriage from a pastor in Seattle named Judah Smith. Instantly, I knew that that’s what God wants. So, we agreed that we would wait until we were married for that. And, yes, we talked about marriage early on. That’s a major difference between courtship and marriage. We weren’t just practicing for divorce. We knew, before starting anything, that this thing was serious.

Early on in our relationship, I had to come clean about something. I knew that I loved her and that I wanted to marry her, but I was scared to make any kind of commitment because, to me, love was something that could dissolve at the drop of a hat. I told her about this. I told her that I was scared to love her. I feared that her love for me might wear off one day. We committed ourselves to praying about it.

The next morning, I woke up humming a familiar tune. I wasn’t sure where it had come from. I was humming a verse from a Jason Upton song, which said, “What God has joined together, let no one separate it.” That verse continued in my head all morning. Then it hit me. That’s not just a song! That’s a Bible verse! It was incredible. God was showing me, through His Word, that He would not let anyone tear our love apart, as long as we made Him the center of our marriage.

From that point on, things were different. I not only knew that Paige was the one, but I trusted God that He would hold us together. Praise God.

Another revolutionary moment was when I first listened to Paul Washer. He laid out for me what courtship really was, and also what dating really was. I found out that, though we were doing many things the right way, we were also doing many things that could take us places we didn’t want to go.

So, we purposed in our hearts to do right and changed the way we were going about things. Our main goal was to not spend time together at my house. So, from then on, I would go to her house, when her parents were home. That way, we were keeping ourselves from dangerous situations, as well as abstaining from the very appearance of evil.

Let’s go ahead and fast forward to October 21, 2006. Around a week beforehand, I sat down with her parents and got their blessing to marry their daughter. But, just so you all know that I’m not some romantic, “knight in shining armor,” let tell you about the day I planned. This being the day I would propose to my wife. First, I took her to the Lexington Barbeque Festival to go witnessing. Then, I had to meet at the Mazda dealership to get rid of my sportscar, in exchange for a four door (I knew God wanted me to eliminate as much debt as possible before opening the next door in our relationship.) Then, it got a little more romantic.

I cooked dinner for Paige at my house. Yes, I know. We were alone at my house. Like I said, we didn’t do everything perfectly. But, in this case, even if I had the chance to do it all over again, I wouldn’t. The night, in my opinion, was perfect.

I had tried to conceal this night, by celebrating her birthday early. So, after dinner, I gave her a tiled mirror as a gift. At this point, I was more nervous than I had ever been in my life. I just went ahead and did it anyway. I knew I would trip over every word, so I prepared a poem for her. Toward the end of the poem, I got down on one knee and asked her to marry her. Of course, she said, “yes.”

Not long after that, we set the date to get married on April 14, 2007. What a wonderful day. I still remember that day sovividly. As I paced behind the altar, and the worship music was being played, I felt so close to God. I thought about the journey I had been on. And I knew that what He was about to join together, no one would ever be able to separate.

I cannot tell you the joy of sharing our first kiss on the altar. So, I won’t even try.

There you have it…our love story. Now one thing I don’t want you to take from this is that we are, in any way, boasting about what WE did to make this happen. Again, all we did was, in the best way we knew how, submit our lives to Christ. He did it. Not us. We are boasting in Him.

I started this article with a Beatles song, and I’ll end it with another song that is a slap in the face to biblical truth. There is a song, that they even play on Christian radio which talks about how God will bless the broken road that you travelled to get to where you are today. If you don’t mind, I’d like to show you the biblical way to look at our pasts. You see, Paige kept herself pure for me. And that was the greatest gift she ever gave me. Unfortunately, I did not do the same for her. For many years, I walked down “a broken road” full of sin, sexual immorality and rebellion. And, trust me, God never blessed it.

Just so you know, that “broken road” has a name. It is the wide road that leads to destruction. God will never bless that road. But here’s what He will do. He will take you, smash you to pieces, create a brand new you, and set you on the narrow road that leads to life.

So, I’m not going to sing about my past. I hate my past because it was full of sin. Now, don’t get me wrong, I have great family and friends from my past. I’m not talking about that. I’m talking about my sin. I will never boast about it. I am ashamed of it and always will be.

Let me finish with two very important lessons.

First of all, though God can wash all of your sins away and make you into a new creation, there are still consequences for your actions. I have scars that will never go away. So, if you are living in any kind of impurity, and think that you can just confess it to God and it will all go away, you are mistaken.

But, on the other hand, I know that for many of you reading this, it’s too late. You’ve already stepped across that line. Here’s my message to you. God is a God of redemption. When you come to him, poor in spirit, and mourn over your sin, he can take your life of ash and turn it into a thing of beauty. He will, of course, smash you to pieces first. But when He is finished, you will be a new creation. And all things will be brand new. So, though John Lennon penned that “all you need is love,” he was dead wrong. All you need is Christ…

photos by korihoffman.com

Have a testimony to share about how God has written

(or is writing!) your love story?

Share it with us by emailing it to: thekingsbride@ymail.com

Heavenly Love Stories: Adam & Paige || pt 1

2011-10-27T19:09:00.000-07:00

Adam and Paige || pt 1
http://ifmypeople.wordpress.com/

April 14, 2007

As told by Paige:

Growing up, when all my friends were dating in middle and high school…let’s just say the guys were not knocking down the door to get to know me! I was awkward, very insecure, and incredibly shy. While those aren’t godly attributes, I do thank God that guys weren’t just dying to talk to me…or this could be a very different story. I had crushes, like every other person. I got disappointed. And most of the guys that did approach me, well, lets just say I was FAR from interested in them. God kept me from having my heart broken. even before I learned what courtship was all about. Even though all my friends who dated, seemed to be having a blast, it sure wasn’t pretty when they broke up.

Let’s fast forward to when I am sixteen ( I think). My youth leaders did a series on courtship. It was a curriculum called “A Match Made in Heaven” by Richard Crisco. It discussed the dangers of dating and how dating is actually practicing for divorce. I won’t cover all the material because there is way too much. But, it was then that I realized that I wanted God’s best. It was hard. I didn’t necessarily commit to the courtship process, but I tried my hardest to keep my heart only for my future husband alone.

In the years that followed, I grew much as a person. I slowly came out of my shell. I was growing in the Lord, and accepting who HE made me to be. I wasn’t supposed to be like all the other girls. He made me different. He made us all different. It is so liberating when we realize this and just learn to be ourself! I devoured resources that encouraged purity. I will list them at the bottom if you are so inclined to read…for yourself or for your children.

So now to the really good stuff! Pay attention to the dates. It was the first Saturday night in January 2004. January 3rd to be exact. At that time, we had prayer on Saturday nights at the church. I was praying, and suddenly, the Lord impressed it on my heart to pray for my future husband, right then. I had no idea who this person was. I wasn’t interested in anyone, and I didn’t know of anyone interested in me. It was strange, but I prayed anyway. I had read about people praying for their future spouse on a regular basis. There had been times when I prayed about it, if it popped in my head, but nothing consistent. But, this night changed everything.

For the next two days, I pondered why God had me pray for this man. It was a feeling of urgency. So two days later, on January 5th, I began to journal heavily about all that I was dealing with. This journal saw many emotions. This journal saw a lot of growth. I was committed to this man I never met. I prayed for him as often as I thought about it…which was probably close to every day. Not fancy prayers. I would just breathe prayers of protection of his life, or that God would help him resist temptation. Things like that.

As I wrote, God showed me other things. It wasn’t just about praying for him. I needed prayer, too. I surely wasn’t wife material. There were things in me that God had to do before I could hope to be ready for the amazing thing called marriage.

So all of 2004 goes by, and nothing. No knight in shining armor for me! Then 2005 begins and…same thing. One night, I think late February, I was introduced to a visitor at our church, a guy named Adam. It was just kind of a quick handshake and “nice -to-meet-you” sort of thing. He begins attending our church on a regular basis. He is a nice guy…not to mention good looking…but that’s about it. Then he starts talking to me. Nothing major, just friendly stuff. I notice that he seems to actually LIKE talking to me, and sought me out to talk to me. I liked this. But, there were some problems. He had just become a Christian in February and was still battling an addiction to painkillers. It was tough, because in my heart, I really, really liked him.But, I knew a relationship with him just could not happen. Not then anyway.

In August 2005, things dramatically changed. Adam was miraculously delivered from his addiction to drugs. But, it was much more than just deliverance from bad addictions. He grew in the Lord by HUGE leaps and bounds. I really don’t think I have ever seen a transformation, with my own eyes, quite like Adam. He began to read the Bible everyday. Since that time, I think he has missed only one or two days of reading since 2005! Incredible. While I watched all this, I was so excited! I started to see qualities in him develop that I desired in my future husband. But, I still knew I had to give it time. Growing up in church, it was so common to see people passionate and on-fire, only to have them go back to their worldly ways and never see them again. I had to know that this change was real, and wasn’t a fleeting passion. We continued to grow as friends. Hardly anyone knew of my feelings toward Adam, though my flesh wanted at least him to know. I think the only ones who knew were my mom, and one close friend who I knew wouldn’t share this with anybody. I felt it was important to keep quiet about it, because the last thing I needed was some “friend” telling me to tell Adam how I felt. Or better yet, having that “friend” tell Adam how I felt. So, I continued to wait.

This next part is kinda funny. January 2 (I think) of 2006. I am attending a church meeting. My pastor introduces me to another young man and is speaking highly of him. Basically, this guy wanted to know if he could call me. This gentleman did not attend our church, but I knew of him. I did give the guy my phone number, but felt weird about it. While flattered, the whole time, I was thinking about Adam. That’s who I wanted! But, since he hadn’t voiced any feelings or anything to me, I couldn’t think of an excuse not to (though I could think of a few now!). Adam was also attending this meeting, and as it turns out, was in earshot of this conversation. This sorta lit a fire under his tail.

The next few days were very conflicting for me. This guy would call. He was nice and all, but I really wasn’t interested. And I didn’t know how to tell that to him, in a nice, honest way. One of my many flaws, is that I beat around the bush…and the person on the receiving end doesn’t seem to get the point. My heart agonized, because I did not want to, in any way, lead this guy on. But, then I thought, maybe I should give this a chance. Maybe this is who God has for me, and not Adam.

Then comes a really good day! January 5, 2006. Adam and I met up for lunch at the yummy K&W! We had met for lunch frequently prior to all of this, so this was not unusual. Earlier that morning, my mom told me it was going to be a good day. So I was expecting something. Not sure what…but something! We eat all of our lunch, and nothing. Just normal conversation. Finally, we both are getting to leave and head back to our jobs. I can’t remember exactly all he said. I think he just blurted out “Um, what are you doing Saturday night?”. Haha! Unfortunately, I really did have plans that night. But was quick to say maybe another night. When I told him, he then proceeded to tell me that he would like to begin a relationship with me and that he called my dad the night before to ask his permission! I’ve heard about young men asking the lady’s father for permission to marry their daughter, but not to begin a relationship. It was very honorable of him to seek my father’s permission before entering into a relationship. I was on cloud nine! The whole day I don’t think I could stop smiling. Shortly after, I realized the significance of this day…it was 2 years to the DAY that I began journaling about him! I was blown away! Talk about timing! God’s timing.

So begins our courtship. Like I said before, we weren’t perfect, and if we could go back, there are things we would do differently. But, early on we were committed to purity. It was awesome, because Adam was actually the one who thought we should save our first kiss for the wedding day. He was not interested in just dating. From the beginning, marriage was in mind. It was so great to not be physically involved, because we really got to know each others personalities really well. We were (and are) very different, but we learned how those things can complement each other.

My birthday is on November 7th. But, this particular year I was going to be away the on weekend of my birthday. Adam wanted to celebrate it early. We decided that we would get together to celebrate it on October 21.

He made dinner for me and gave me this beautiful mirror that I LOVE! Then he hands me this piece of paper and wants me to read aloud. I start getting a hunch at whats going on, but try not to go crazy in case I was wrong. The Paper read :

To My Beautiful Paige

To my beautiful Paige, I give my heart.
To explain my love, where should I start?
First of all; the day I saw you I fell in love.
Now, I know God sent you, like a gift from above.
Knowing you love me is such a blessing to me.
God unlocked my heart, but you were His key.
Knowing that I can love you and you’ll love me back;
I promise my love for you will never grow slack.
What a journey it’s been, falling in love with you.
I’m so much in love, I hardly know what to do.
I think about you all day; morning, noon and night.
I imagine our future what a beautiful sight.
Speaking of our future, I want to do things right.
I could hardly wait for this wonderful night.
I went to your folks and they said O.K.
Now I hope I don’t trip over the words I say.
Just the thought of this moment makes my blood pressure rise.
So just put down this paper so I can look into your eyes…

I wish I could remember verbatim what he said at this point! I know he told me that he loved me and asked if I would marry him. He then opened a box with an incredibly gorgeous ring in it! Of course, without even seeing the ring my answer was a big, fat “YES!” But, let me tell you about this ring. Us women love to look at pictures of engagement rings and wedding dresses and all that good stuff. I liked the princess cut, but I really liked the emerald cut diamond ring. I never told Adam what I liked, but I did tell my friend (now sister-in-law) what I liked and so he found out through her. It was a stunning ring.

After that ring was placed on my finger, he proceeded to tell me something I didn’t know about emerald cut diamonds. For that particular size and cut, the diamond has to be very pure, or it will be easy to spot imperfections. He added, that knowing this reminded him of me and my desire to remain pure! Wow! I was so blown away. What a beautiful gift!

Shortly after, we decided on a wedding date of April 14, 2007. During our engagement the Lord strongly revealed some areas that we needed to change. When we compare ourselves to others, its easy to justify certain actions. But when the Holy Spirit convicts us, no matter how good we think we are, we had better obey. Adam had his own home and had a roommate living there. And we hung out there a lot of the time. Again, we were strong and really would just hang out and talk or watch a movie. But, there are a few things very wrong about this. 1 Thessalonians 5:22 says “Abstain from all appearance of evil”. In 1 Corinthians 8 it talks about not being a stumbling block to others. It just didn’t look good, me being there with him, many times alone. We were involved in youth ministry and how would this have looked to them? We may have been strong and in control of ourselves, but this was sending a message to them that they could do this with no problems as well. By the grace of God alone, we were strong. But, had we had one weak moment, things could have changed dramatically. It’s like playing with fire. I am not saying you can never, ever be alone. But there are principles in the courtship process that allow for that in a safer environment then your boyfriends home or apartment. My mom had even warned me about it not looking good, even though she trusted us, but I just shrugged it off (outwardly), though it was still deep in my thoughts. The kind of thoughts you just tuck away and choose not to think of. But in January of ’07. God dealt with us and Adam decided that I shouldn’t come over anymore. He would start coming to my house ( I lived with my parents) a lot more. It’s hard when you know you have sinned against God, but such grace when you repent and do things completely the right way!

FINALLY- April 14th arrives! This was a perfect day in every way. I wasn’t nervous. I was sure and really happy! Of course, there was excitement and a little nervousness about the wedding and all those people watching me, and just the fact that I was getting ready to vow my life to another person. But I was sure and I knew this was the man that God designed for me to be with. The weather was perfect. Things ran smoothly. Well except for one part. I had read of a couple who had a footwashing in there ceremony. If you recall in the Bible. where Jesus washed the feet of his disciples as a symbols of servanthood and humility . We wanted to symbolically say, ” I will serve you”. It was a beautiful moment except for when it was my turn to wash his feet, trying to put a dress sock on a damp foot wasn’t easy! You had to be there….it was just funny! But it was a perfect ceremony. We exchanged rings, and vows. ” The pastor then pronounces ” Mr. and Mrs. Adam Tennant….you may kiss the bride”! That long-awaited kiss finally came! A beautiful kiss! Such a good kiss, I asked him for another one there at the altar! It was surreal and I felt like I was floating! God truly had the best for me in every way. Be encouraged to wait on the Lord and not take things into your own hands.

And that’s the beginning of our journey, The romance didn’t die at the honeymoon, either. He is still so loving toward me. We aren’t perfect and are still learning so much about one another. But I have to say it has been something I would do all over again in a heartbeat! He is an amazing man and I love him to death!

photos by korihoffman.com

Have a testimony to share about how God has written

(or is writing!) your love story?

Share it with us by emailing it to: thekingsbride@ymail.com

Romance, God's Way

2011-10-26T08:45:00.000-07:00

Quotations on Romance

Eric & Leslie Ludy

“Before our relationship ever began, we each individually made a decision to go against the cultural norm – even the Christian norm – by setting ourselves completely aside for each other in every way – mentally, emotionally, and physically. It was a difficult decision to make, yet it was the best foundation we ever could have laid for our marriage.”

“If your future spouse could see you now, as you interact with members of the opposite sex, how would they feel? Would they feel hurt and jealous, or adored and special?”

“Faithfulness is not something that should begin only after the marriage vows are spoken. Faithfulness should be learned and practiced throughout our lifetime.”

“A letter represents something far more than a kiss ever could. It evidences thoughtfulness and the gift of time. While a kiss can prove tender, it must overcome the stigma of impulsiveness to truly display love. A letter on the other hand, when written in the spirit of ardor and romance – even if it never mentions passion – strokes the heart deeper than any other form of physical touch. A kiss cannot be felt again and again from a great distance, but a letter can be read and reread thousands of times. A kiss only familiarizes the lips with the physical body of a lover. A letter familiarizes the heart, mind, and soul. Maybe that’s why God chose to write us a letter.”

“God knows what we’re attracted to better than we do.”

“Give God the Pen. The single reason He gave us the pen was so we could give it back to Him.”

“Tenderness means looking at life through their eyes.”

“Romance is more difficult after the honeymoon because you’ve won their heart…now you must cherish their heart.”

“A woman’s perception of her beauty is shaped by the men in her life. So be artists, be gentle and tender with the words you guys speak.”

“A man’s sense of masculinity and confidence flows directly from the women in his life. If the thing he works hard at is validated by a woman, it will stay with him for the rest of his life.”

Advice To Girls: “Keep your standards high and keep trusting that that Knight in Shining Armor is out there for you and set yourself aside completely in purity for that person.”

Advice To Guys: “Same thing, but also the character of Christ. I deal with girls all over the country—all over the world even—and I know that they’re more impressed with sensitivity, kindness, gentleness, and a pure heart than they are with muscles, smooth talk, and everything down just perfect. It’s the character of Christ that will win out in the end. So if you keep your standards high, God will not disappoint you.”

Many years ago, I was introduced to Eric and Leslie Ludy; a couple who saved their first kiss together for their wedding day. I was moved. I was inspired. I was motivated. Because of their story, I chose to remain practice purity - of the mind, heart, and body - and save it all for my husband on our wedding day. In March of 2010, just one month before my wedding, I was blessed to be able to attend a conference with two of my sisters where I met them and was able to share how God used their testimony in my life. I pray you, too, will be encouraged to learn about romance....God's way.

Heavenly Love Stories: Jason & Katy || pt 1

2011-10-22T10:02:00.000-07:00

Jason and Katy || pt 1
http://110surrendered.blogspot.com/

May 28, 2011

As told by Katy:

Well, each story has a beginning and so I thought I would share ours :) Lets go back to March of 2010.

On March 14th my world had turned upside down..in a bad way. I had been in a courtship relationship for a little over three months and some things had come to light in the young mans life and my Dad (who is my hero) made the decision to break off our courtship. I was devastated.

All my life all I had wanted was to be a wife and Mother. I asked God why He would give me my dream only to snatch it away. In the weeks that followed the Lord began to show me. He showed me that my entire life I had allowed desperation to lead my heart and my life. I had looked to guys for my fulfillment.

Marriage had become an idol.

I was so afraid at the thought of possibly being alone for the rest of my life. But one night the Lord gave me this thought one night: "What if the Lord is calling me to be single for the rest of my life?"

I cringed.

He couldn't be. Could He?

Then I realized what an idol not being alone was to me. And I knew I had to make a decision. Would I surrender my entire life to the Lord's service even if it meant being alone? I thought. And prayed. And probably cried. And then purposed in my heart to serve my Jesus no matter what. That is when I started taking steps towards nursing, because I knew that I could be independent and serve the Lord in that way. I had never wanted a career. But that day when I decided to move forward in my independence I surrendered my hopes and dreams to the Lord. I surrendered my future and stepped out in faith. Alone....for the first time in my life, with only Jesus by my side.

No prospects. No possibilities.

I was heading to the mission field to serve my Jesus in my singleness and I was super excited about it! And nothing was going to stop me!

Ahem. The Lord's ways are not our ways.

One of my girls that had been going to my girls Bible study invited me to a Bible study she had been attending on Sundays. I really did not want to go anywhere near the male species. But I decided I could not stay away from contact with the male species forever. So I swallowed my fear and went.

March 28, 2010. Exactly two weeks to the day my courtship had been broken off. So I get there. There were a ton of people there and I didn't know anyone! So I just sat there and waited for study to start. The leader had gone to pick up someone and so we were waiting for him to get back. Finally he got there and he walked into the room. Jason Hollands. My heart sank. He was very handsome in the white button down shirt and tan pants.

Katy you do not even look at him.

He had a purity ring on that looked like a wedding band. Oh wow that is really neat. Oh snap! Katy cut it out. Do not look at him.

And wow was he a spiritual leader. I sat there amazed as he started the Bible study. The one thing that made the most impact on me was how he prayed. Oh how he prayed.....and it wasn't a show. It was just him coming before his Heavenly Father and having a talk with Him. And it was anytime. Anything. No matter how big or how small. And as we went around the circle, at the very end, he prayed for me. Just me. By name.

Katy stop it! You are going to be single. And happy. And serve the Lord. IN A SINGLE WAY!

I cried the whole way home and went upstairs and determined to not ever go back to Bible Study again. Never. In fact I was not going to ever going to go around guys again. I was considering being a nun! So Mom came upstairs and asked me what was wrong. And finally I admitted that I was just terrified about making the old mistakes with allowing desperation to guide my heart and life and I just knew somehow that if I kept going back I would possibly develop a mindless crush on Jason and I just did not want to even have to struggle with guarding my heart again! I was going to serve the Lord. As a single woman.

Well, Mom ended up telling me that yes I had to slay the old fleshly tendencies to let desperation to lead my heart but hiding was not going to cut it. So, she said to not initiate anything with him. I really clicked with his younger sister Sarah (we talked for hours the first Bible study) and she said to just focus on my friendship with Sarah. So I kept going to Bible Study. On April 4, 2010 I wrote this in my journal about Bible Study:

"Please help me to jealously guard my heart, Lord. Please help me to never go to Bible study just because there are guys there Lord. I truly do just want to be fed spiritually Lord. The reason I am praying about this is because there is a guy there that, if I went back to my old pattern of going from guy to guy searching for completion (out of desperation), I would be tempted to start obsessing/dreaming/crushing about. Jason Hollands is the leader there and very godly BUT I do not know him. I have decided, as a part of slaying this old, fleshly tendency, that I am not going to initiate anything with Jason. I will be friendly but not go out of my way I guess. He friend requested all of us kids today and so I accepted him. Tonight I was on face book and all the sudden he started chatting with me. It was so nice. We just talked about You and encouraged each other in You. I really think we could be good friends but, as of right now, I don't see it as anything more because I DON'T KNOW HIM."

Oh, if I had only known.

So I did not initiate anything. At all. And as the weeks and months went on and we started spending more and more time together I was friendly but did not initiate anything. Jason told me later that me not swooning all over him is actually what intrigued him about me. A few times he thought: What is wrong with her?

We continued to get to know each other, and I started to have feelings for him. And I started to pray that the Lord would take the feelings away. But strangely it didn't work. For months! So when did it start to change? Well...you are going to just have to wait for part 2 :)

Have a testimony to share about how God has written

(or is writing!) your love story?

Share it with us by emailing it to: thekingsbride@ymail.com

Waiting On Him: Marli's Story

2011-09-24T07:25:00.000-07:00

Marli's Story
http://purposelyathome.blogspot.com/

The day was November 23rd, my 10th birthday. I remembered the night well. A special night had been planned for me, just me! Mom and Dad had reserved the evening for the three of us to have dinner at a elaborate restaurant, while my brother and sister stayed with my grandparents. I anticipated the evening with enthusiasm!

After arriving at the restaurant, Mom and Dad began talking to me about remaining pure as I waited on my prince charming. They had also suggested, as I was growing older, my first kiss would be a special gift. They encouraged me to save that kiss for my husband on our wedding day.

At one moment during the dinner, I remember asking my mom for a Tylenol. She told me, “Okay, you can get it out of my purse.” I looked in her purse and there it was lying among the other purse items, a tiny wrapped package. I looked at Mom and Dad. They were both smiling. After confirming that the gift was for me, I pulled it out and opened the small package.

It was a little ring box which contained the most beautiful, gold ring displaying a petite diamond on top. I was pleasantly surprised. Mom and Dad told me this ring would become a symbol of our evening together, representing the promise I had made to them and to my future husband. It would become a constant reminder that I was to protect the unique and irreplaceable gifts God had given me - that were intended for my husband, and him only, on my wedding day.

I have been blessed to live in a Christian home my entire life. This was not the first time I had a conversation with my parents about purity. I have always acknowledged that saving my first kiss would further delay the sexual act and help prevent the hasty giving of myself emotionally to a guy.

It makes me sad to think that in today’s world that so many young ladies are not virgins anymore. When others see my purity ring and ask what it symbolizes, I consider it a privilege to explain to them the promises that I am keeping. Some find it shocking and hard to believe. But, I look forward to the day that I can present myself to my husband as an anticipated “unwrapped gift.”

Another representation of my purity ring is in the area of my relationships with guys. I have made the commitment to replace dating with old-fashioned courting. Courting isn’t a bad word, it is actually a very safe word. My definition of courting is getting to know someone in the company of family or friends. This is another principle that I adopted in my teen years.

I want my parents involved 100 % in the process of me choosing a mate. Many of my friends’ parents do not even know who their children are associating with, much less, dating. I don’t want that to be my circumstance. I want it to be a family affair, even with the brother and sister involved. It can actually be a lot of fun! Having an older brother who is courting has given me a positive view of what it can be like. I have also come to realize how important boundaries are in a relationship. I have read numerous stories of courtships. Most courtships are adapted to their personal expectations, but most happily choose the safety of physical boundaries and getting to know each other within a family setting versus being alone in a dating situation.

One of my greatest struggles is remaining content as I wait for my special someone. Handing the pen over to Christ and allowing Him to script my love story is the hardest thing I have ever done in my life. As I watch other couples walking hand-in-hand, I occasionally feel discouraged. However, I constantly remind myself that God has the perfect love story planned for me. In my opinion, shuffling from guy to guy just for the sake of companionship would not be part of His perfect plan.

So, what’s a girl to do? Taking advantage of this phase in our lives to be an encouragement to our male friends in the faith, would be beneficial to all those involved. As I treat them as my brothers, “with all purity,” I can strengthen them spiritually and display to them characteristics of a true female friendship(1 Timothy 5:1, 2). The characteristics of flirtatious girls are described in Proverbs 7. This type of conduct should be avoided, as it creates hardships on our guy friends to remain pure gentlemen. As we adopt the practice of building our male friends up in their everyday accomplishments, instead of seeking them as a potential mate, they will appreciate our chaste behavior. If our actions are mature in dealing with our guy friends, the more respectful they will treat us.

It may seem difficult remaining pure and spotless in a polluted world, but we can be the one who goes against the flow. We should not be bashful about reclaiming a commitment to purity. Saving your special kiss, allowing your parents to guide you through a healthy relationship and treating guys with brotherly kindness will persuade others to demonstrate a more perfect Christian walk. I pray that we all can live a life of purity…with no regrets.

Have a testimony to share about how God is writing your love story?
Want to encourage others to wait on His timing?

Share it with us by emailing it to: thekingsbride@ymail.com

Waiting For You

2011-09-08T14:06:00.000-07:00

Back in 2009, two friends became engaged. Jason and Jessica. Their story is featured here on King's Bride. As I eagerly awaited their wedding, I found myself penning the following song down. Later, I ended up recording a demo and sending it to them, it having been inspired by their story. At the time, I was seven months away from my own wedding and anxiously awaiting the day I, too, would be able to say to my groom, "I've been waiting for you!"

I hope you are encouraged to continue to wait.

Click here to listen to "Waiting For You"

He was running through the fields
She was picking flowers
He was fishing in the pond
She was playing house
Now they're standing at the alter together
They're about to exchange their wedding vows

As they look into the eyes of one another
You can almost hear them as they say...

Chorus:
I've been waiting for you
I've been praying for you
And now I'll spend my life with you
God sent you to me after faithfully
Waiting for you

There were days
When he almost gave up hoping
There were nights
When she wondered at God's plan
But they waited and they both remained faithful
Entrusting their lives into God's hands

Now as loved ones and friends all gather 'round
You can almost see the Savior smiling down
As they say....

Chorus:
I've been waiting for you
I've been praying for you
And now I'll spend my life with you
God sent you to me after faithfully
Waiting for you

God Hasn't Forgotten You

2011-09-07T11:57:00.000-07:00

Home from Wednesday night youth meeting, she walked into her room, tossed her purse and Bible on her desk, then dropped to her bed. With a tired sigh that went beyond physical fatigue, she just sat there silently, lost in thought.

Another night with Church friends who were more like acquaintances....

Another night having to ignore the silly giggling from "that couple"....

Another night of being given scowls and glares when she spoke anything remotely concerning set-apartness....

With a pounding headache and an aching heart, she sat there, silently, wondering what she should do. Nobody wanted to live differently. Nobody really even liked her. Oh, they liked parts of her, I suppose, but nobody truly wanted to be her friend....and she knew why. She was different. She believed different things.... like love being worth waiting for; like purity being something to prize and protect. She dressed in a different way.... no miniskirts or plunging, low necklines. She acted differently too. She didn't shameless flirt with the guys around her. She didn't let out the cute little giggle when a guy made eyes at her. She didn't bat her long eyelashes their way or sway as she walked pass them. She was far different from those around her and though she was proud of that fact, the frustration of being utterly alone in her pursuit of "different living" was beginning to weigh on her.

"Lord," she prayed. "Have you forgotten about me?"

With tears in her eyes, looked down at her bedspread. "God....were you watching tonight? Did You see them sneak that kiss with the youth director left the room? Did You hear what they were whispering to each other and writing about all throughout the lesson? Do You see how they treat me?.....God, they all act like they are so happy with their significant other. I know I have chosen the right path and the right way, so why am I hurting right now?? Why am I lonely tonight when they are giggling like crazy?? God, are You still there??"

I remember that night. Actually, I remember many nights exactly like that. Sadly, in my pursuit of purity, I had no support system outside of my parents. If it hadn't been for them, I could have possibility been driven to lowering my standards. But oh, how I wanted to be different! I wanted to be truly set-apart. Because of the fact that practically everyone my age thought I was crazy in that area of my life, there was no one to encourage me to hang in there other than my mom and dad. At that time, I was having so many attacks from friends, Church people, and even family members who thought that my "set-apart" way of living was unrealistic, old fashioned, outdated, lame, a form of abuse from my parents, and the like.

It hurt.

I remember that night as I sat on my bed, trying to keep my tears from pouring down my face. I felt lonely that night. I felt forgotten by God. And it was then that He gave me these words:

Come back to me.

In moments of doubt and frustration and loneliness, instead of wallowing in self-pity, what we SHOULD do is run back into the comforting arms of the Lord. His strength is made perfect in weakness. When we stray a bit from Him, we begin to feel its effects. We grow stale in our faith. We begin to doubt. We get lonely. We even wonder, as I did, if God has forgotten all about us. After that night, I tried to take those moments of loneliness as a call from my Father to come back to Him. HE never leaves. We do the leaving; we do the straying. And though WE may forget the many promises that He has made, He never forgets.

When we hurt, He feels that hurt and longs for us to allow Him to comfort us.

When we are lonely, He aches with us, yearning to wrap us up in His arms.

When we are tired of waiting, He is there, ready to sustain us with His strength.

In your pursuit of purity and in your season of waiting, I want to encourage you to, as Mary Slessor once said, keep close to Jesus. Do not stray from His presence. In those moments of loneliness, please remember that God has not forgotten you, nor will He. He sees far beyond what we see and is scripting a beautiful love story for you....all you have to do is give Him the pen and trust Him.

A Bride's Walk

2011-09-01T15:51:00.000-07:00

To me, one of the grandest moments of a wedding ceremony is when the bride makes her entrance and begins walking down the aisle. The music swells, all heads turn, the crowd rises, the groom is full of emotion, and - THERE SHE IS!

Slowly, she begins walking down the aisle toward her groom; her beloved.

I remember my walk.

I had been choked with emotion listening as each song was played. The candles were lit during "Sunrise." Then "Great is Thy Faithfulness" began as our grandmothers and mothers were escorted to their seats. Then my groom and his groomsmen entered. After that, everyone was still as Grant's and my song began to play. As it ended, I took a breath. The processional was about to begin. I listened as the music began and watched as my friends and sisters made their way down the aisle. I remember being momentarily distracted by the timing and made a motion for the ring bearer to begin walking. Then, it hit me. It was time. This was it. I took my Dad's arm and made my way to the aisle, quickly pausing before we began our walk.

As I stood there, I searched for my groom's face. There he was....at the end of the aisle, waiting for me to join him. I gave the biggest smile I could muster and began to walk, keeping my eyes focused on him. Though the crowd stood to honor me, and though my uncle loudly blew the shofar horn, through all the commotion, I fixed my eyes on Grant knowing that if I could just keep looking to him, I would make it. A part of me was afraid. "I'm getting married. My whole life is about to dramatically change." A part of me wanted to burst into tears, thankful and grateful for all the blessings. A part of me wanted to run down the aisle towards him before he got cold feet and changed his mind! But I kept a steady walk and focused on his face, on his eyes.

Finally, we made it to the alter. As I looked at my groom, I saw a mixture of joy and awe. He gave me a small smile and nodded, telling me that he thought I looked gorgeous. Then, he took my hand and the ceremony began!

Obviously, the bride's walk is one of everyone's favorite parts of a wedding day.

As I began to think back, I couldn't help but think that our walk, as Christians, should be very similar to a bride's walk down the aisle.

I cannot say that every bride does what I did, which was focus in on my groom, but I do know that that is exactly what every Christian needs to do when walking through this life.

In this world, there is pain and trials. There is hardship. There are sometimes roads that are long and lonely. Sometimes the cross we carry is exceptionally heavy to bear. But, sisters, LOOK to JESUS.

When you are afraid, focus your eyes on Jesus.

When you are tired, fix your gaze upon His face.

When you are weary, keep walking steadily onward towards Him.

When you stumble, get back up and continue on.

Hebrews 12:1 says, "Wherefore seeing we also are compassed about with so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which doth so easily beset us, and let us run with patience the race that is set before us." Then comes the best part that gives us hope....

Hebrews 12:2a - "Looking unto Jesus the author and finisher of our faith...."

Looking unto Jesus. Looking unto Him.

As the bride of Jesus Christ, let us lay aside all the things that so easily hold us back and let us steady our eyes upon the beautiful face of our Master and walk towards Him. Sometimes, there will be the commotion of life that will threaten to deter us. Sometimes our own fears may tempt us to pause. But if we will keep our eyes focused on the throne and upon our beloved Bridegroom, and walk on, we will make it one day. And what a wonderful day it will be when we finally reach the "alter" of Heaven and be with our Beloved for all eternity! On that day, we won't be thinking much of the long walk down the aisle. We will only be basking in the love of our King!

Ephesians 4:1
"I therefore, the prisoner of the Lord, beseech you that ye walk worthy of the vocation wherewith ye are called."


Ephesians 4:17
"This I say therefore, and testify in the Lord, that ye henceforth walk not as other Gentiles walk, in the vanity of their mind."

Ephesians 5:8b
"....walk as children of light."

Purity Lost

2011-08-17T13:27:00.000-07:00

I do not understand the mentality of this society. No one listens to the voice(s) that's crying out; voices of caution. No one heeds the warning signs anymore. I will never understand why so many gift away the most beautiful, priceless thing they own as a mere trinket. They choose to give away their purty - a precious, God-given jewel - like something they bought from a dime store. I don't understand why they offer it up to the highest bidder or give it out as a prize for a game; why they hand it over without question, without committment. A heated moment in the backseat and all is lost. Love just isn't patient anymore.

It seems as though, every time I turn around, I hear of another friend, loved one, or acquaintance who has gone down the road of premarital sex. And I wonder why. If I could only sit down with them, I would ask them WHY?

Why did you give it all away? What was your reason? What justified your actions? Don't you know that there is a better way? Do you not see the damage you have done? Did you do it because you wanted to feel loved and accepted? Why not turn to God who loves you so much He gave His Son to die for you? Why not turn to the Author of love? Why? Why?

Jeremiah 29:11-13
"For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the LORD, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end. Then shall ye call upon me, and ye shall go and pray unto me, and I will hearken unto you. And ye shall seek me, and find me, when ye shall search for me with all your heart."

As a teenager, I remember spending night crying over losing one friend after the next to sexual promiscuity. I would see them beging to date around, then slowly give themselves away. Next, I would see heartbreak, pregnancy, diseases. I saw a tremendous amount of emotional pain by toying with sexual sin. It hurt me to see them go through so much....it still hurts today. If only they had resisted Satan's temptation.

In 2004 I wrote the following prayer in my journal:

Oh Lord, please come and touch my generation. May it be a generation that pleases You!..a pure, unadulterated, clean generation who lives to glorify You in their bodies. Help me, as a Christian, come out and separate myself from the ungodliness of our society and be a light in this world.

Now, seven years later, I echo that same prayer.

I pray each one of you will hold on to your precious purity and guard it; treasure it; keep it safe. Keep it sacred. Do not lose something so valuable and beautiful.

Psalm 37:3-7
"Trust in the LORD, and do good; so shalt thou dwell in the land, and verily thou shalt be fed. Delight thyself also in the LORD: and he shall give thee the desires of thine heart. Commit thy way unto the LORD; trust also in him; and he shall bring it to pass. And he shall bring forth thy righteousness as the light, and thy judgment as the noonday. Rest in the LORD, and wait patiently for him: fret not thyself because of him who prospereth in his way, because of the man who bringeth wicked devices to pass."

Do you know what you have done;
What you had, then gave away?
I gave you something so special,
Something wonderful to save.

I gave you your purity,
Something that I made
For your one and only love
That I would send your way.

But you threw it to the wind
With no thought of tomorrow.
You had your fun and pleasure
That soon turned to sorrow.

You gave away to many
What I had made for only one,
And the sin you have committed
Has been placed upon my Son.

Why did you give it all away
When you could have had a life so pure?
All you had to do was trust me
But now the pain, you must endure.

I love you still, and you are forgiven.
There is cleansing and freedom today.
But it does not change your past.
Oh, why did you give it all away?

A Man's Thoughts on Modesty

2011-07-07T12:35:00.000-07:00

10 Things I'm Learning in Marriage

2011-06-30T17:48:00.000-07:00

The wedding is one day....The marriage is a lifetime.

And nothing about marriage comes natural. Why? Because marriage is hard work.

I am sure many people enter into marriage thinking that they have a head start. I know I did. How wrong I was. Just like nothing can prepare you for parenthood until you actually become a parent, nothing can quite prepare you for the marriage relationship.

I know that being married for one year and two months makes me a "newbie" still, but I am here to testify that once you are married, the lessons begin! You start learning right away! And here are a few things that God has taught (and is still teaching) me!

1. Christ must be your fulfillment. This lesson should begin long before the "I Do's" are spoken. It is very easy to rely on your spouse to fulfil you, but listen to me: this never works. There have been plenty of moments when I have grown irritated when Grant hasn't met my every need. It is then that I have had to be reminded by the Lord to stop and remember an invaluable truth: HE is all. Nobody, not even your dearest friend and soul mate, can meet all your needs. God created it to be this way as an ever-constant reminder that HE is God and the only One who can fulfill us completely.

2. Remember your spouse is a sinner. Yes, Grant is my prince charming. Yes, he is a man of God. Yes, he will stop and pray no matter when or where. Yes, he is my best earthly friend. But he is not perfect. I have seen him angry, irritated, and stressed out. I know what makes him tick (yes, he can get ticked). I know his weaknesses and his imperfections. He is still a sinner.....and as much as it hurts my pride to say it.... I am one too.

3. Pick your battles. That's a toughie. At first, it sounds like 100% fun all the time to live with your best friend. And, to a degree, it IS fun! But it is also work. Habits can become annoying (like the clearing of the throat in the shower every morning). Little things can get under your skin (like finding little hairs all over the sink after a shave). But I have to remember to stop and ask myself, "Is this worth getting angry over? Is this thing worth picking a fight about?" Most of the time, it's not. So pick your battles.

4. Learn how to make up. Pride has to die in a marriage relationship. It is easy for me to gloat when I am proven right in a disagreement. And it is very easy to refuse to say "I'm sorry." But it MUST be done! Disagreements are inevitable in marriage. Marriage takes two different people (male and female) who grew up in two different families (sometimes in two very different circumstances), with two different personalities and character traits, and it thrusts them together in tight living spaces. It's impossible for two opposite creatures to live in constant harmony. So you will have moments that are not pleasant. But one thing that has to be learned is the art of making up. Get over yourself. Let go of your pride. Remember you LOVE your spouse and made some serious vows to him/her. Forgive. Forget. Move on. It is rewarding if you do!

5. Compromise. I like to talk things out. Grant does not. When there has been a disagreement or if I feel unsettled about something, I need to talk about things in order to move past it. Grant prefers to go into "internal hibernation" for a while. So....what do we do in this situation? We learn to compromise. Sometimes I need to give Grant an hour or more to keep from overwhelming him or for him to get his thoughts together. Sometimes Grant puts those things aside in order to sit down immediately with me to talk about how I feel. We don't take turns. We just do our best to find the happy medium no matter what the situation may be.

6. Let go of your rights. I am still struggling with this area. Sometimes I don't want to compromise. Sometimes I want my way. Sometimes I am downright selfish. And sometimes I believe I have a "right" to act like a self-centered wife. But the more I study and pray, the more I find that we, as Christians, should let go of our rights. In all honesty, we have none. We gave up all our rights when we allowed Jesus to take over and buy us "with a price." So let go.

7. Have a date night. The reality of life can wear you down. Sometimes we get SO busy! It is for this reason that it is important to have a date night fairly often. For Grant and I, this was hard. We were married for three months when I got pregnant. Morning sickness, a growing belly, feeling tired, THEN a new baby! All in one year! A date night? Yeah right. But it is so important to make time for one another. Recently Grant and I did just that and WOW! It was such a blessing to be able to get away and simply enjoy each other's company. Even if you don't have the money to go out, stay in, turn the TV off and talk to one another. Or cook a hearty meal and rent a movie. Reminisce with each other. Just enjoy being together as husband and wife. Your relationship as husband and wife comes before all else, save your relationship with the Lord.

8. Be each other's best friend. Growing up, I had what I thought were a few "best friends" here and there. How wrong I was. Grant is literally my best earthly friend. I can let my hair down with him. I can be 100% me. He knows me, sometimes better than I know myself. And I know him better than anyone else. We belly laugh together. We tell crazy jokes. We giggle like teenagers. We hop in the truck and take off down dirt roads blaring music and singing. We pray together. We tell each other things that are difficult for the other to hear. We are there for one another....through thick and thin, good and bad. Don't ever let outside friendships and relationships, work, hobbies, or anything of the like stand in the way of you and your spouse being best friends.

9. Protect your spouse and your marriage. Privacy in marriage is almost foreign these days. And it shouldn't be! From the very beginning of our relationship, I made a personal committment that private things would always remain private. Marriage is a "bear-all" relationship. You are totally revealed in every way to your spouse. Protect that. Keep it sacred. I have vowed, when Grant and I have a disagreement, to never talk about it to anyone. It is no one's business and my words, even at a time when I may be upset, could hurt my husband and bring him disrespect. It is personal and between him, myself, and the Lord. I have vowed never to have "bedroom discussions" with girlfriends. The bedroom is sacred, holy, and deserves the utmost privacy. There are plenty of outside things that should be guarded against. Protect your spouse and your marriage.

10. Pray and pray together. Pray for you spouse. Pray that he can be a strong, passionate, mighty man of God. Pray that she can rise and be a valiant, virtuous woman of faith. Pray for strength. Pray for wisdom. Pray for your marriage as a whole. Pray for your children. Pray for yourself. Then pray together. Prayer brings unity. Praying alone can bring you closer to the throne of God and closer to His will. Praying together as a couple brings you closer together AS you draw nearer to the heart of God. Prayer brings unity and it brings strength. Always, always, always pray! Never cease!

While I'm Waiting

2011-06-29T12:41:00.000-07:00

Earlier this month at camp, I was given the opportunity to share my testimony and speak about my purity, modesty, and my love story with Grant. It was good to go back in time and relive those years, remembering what God taught me and how faithful He was....even when I couldn't see it at the time.

There are plenty of books in the Christian community on "Christian dating" and "how to avoid going all the way" but there aren't many books or lessons or messages on simply waiting. I'm not talking about abstinence. That should be a given. I am talking about truly waiting on God; on His timing, on His "green-light," and waiting for HIS choice (not ours) for our mate.

Many think that waiting means doing nothing. You're just sitting around with no social life, nothing to do......waiting....and waiting....and waiting. Let me tell you, that is not so!

The Lord gives us a season of singleness for a reason. When we are married, we think much about our spouse (and so we should) and we care for the things in marriage. However, when we are single, we are free of distraction and free from the marital responsibilities, and that gives us ample time to dwell on Christ, growing closer to Him, and developing an intimate relationship with Him that helps us in marriage. It all works together for a grand reason! God made a special season for singles. And you should "redeem the time" as Ephesians 5:16 says and, with wisdom, USE that time for His glory!

Waiting On Him: Sarah's Story

2011-06-16T10:52:00.000-07:00

Sarah’s Story

I have grown up in a Christian home my whole life, which I am incredibly thankful for. At a young age, I always thought it would be easy for a Christian girl (I accepted Christ at age 7) in a Christian home to live the Christian way. I thought that if I was surrounded by God’s people that it would be easy to live right, walk right, and be pure in God’s eyes. I was mistaken. Just because someone knows, believes, and is surrounded by the truth doesn’t mean that everything will be a walk in the park.

At the age of 14, I went to a purity conference that was hosted by my church. This was about the time that I started becoming interested in boys. I wasn’t flirting with them because I was shy, but I still wondered if they liked me. At this purity conference, I was opened up to a new way of thinking when it came to purity and relationships. The woman teaching gave all of the girls there a sheet of paper that had these words in it: Calling/texting, hanging out, holding hands, hugging, small kissing (a peck every once in a while), frequent kissing (a more meaningful kiss, but not too much), passionate kissing, and intimacy. The way these scenarios were arranged was at the very bottom of the sheet were the words ‘calling/texting’ and at the top were the words ‘intimacy’, and everything else was in the middle of the page, listed in the above order. She then gave us all a pen and said that when we were in a relationship one day, where would we draw the line? Would we stop our relationship with small kissing, and save the rest for marriage? Would we stop at frequent kissing and have the strength to save everything left for marriage? So, she told us to draw a line under the scenario that would be our stopping point in a relationship. All the girls made their choice that night, and mine was to stop at small kissing.

After we had all made our choices, the teacher began to tell us the dangers with some of these scenarios, and how that if we didn’t guard our hearts, we could end up going further than the line we drew. I listened to her, but I didn’t take everything to heart that she was saying. Everything was true, but I had drawn my line and I wasn’t going to budge. I was a strong, Christian young lady living in a Christian home, surrounded by Godly people. I wouldn’t fall for the things that other girls fell for. I was a good girl with a line that couldn’t be crossed.

Wrong. I was so terribly wrong. While I kept my mind and heart pure for God and my future husband, I wasn’t mature enough to handle a relationship the right way. I was in two different relationships and both of them were born out of my selfishness of wanting a boyfriend because all of my friends had one. I truly liked the guys, but I was looking for someone to accept me. You see, what I thought was pureness of mind was not what God thought of pureness of mind. I was constantly thinking about a boyfriend and all the benefits that I could get from a relationship: someone to like and accept me, bragging rights, and not being lonely. When I would be in a relationship and I wasn’t getting those benefits, I would give more of myself, throwing all of my emotions into making the relationship work.

At one point, not only was I kissing a guy, but I found myself wanting to give more. I stepped over my line I had drawn, and I did it all myself, not just because a guy was pressuring me. I willingly wanted more, so I selfishly gave more. I was still concerned about not stepping over “that line” where one goes from being a virgin to not. The problem with that is once I erase the line, where do I draw it back? If I blur the line over here, can I draw it back over there and still be okay? In this whole process, I didn’t realize that I was getting my heart broken. I Thessalonians 5:22 says to “Abstain from all appearance of evil” and while I have heard this verse my whole life, it wasn’t until after my second relationship that I truly started running from evil. My whole life I had stayed away from the really bad stuff, but is that enough?

Around the age of 17, there were several nights where I lay in my bed crying, asking “God, what do you want me to do? Is there something better than this? Will I ever get married? What am I doing wrong?” There were so many questions and tears, and I had to give everything to Him. A little after my 18th birthday, I decided to save myself completely for my future husband, so I made a big commitment: I am going to save my next kiss for my future husband. This is huge for me. I also committed that I will not give my heart away to another man until I know for sure that he is the one God has for me. With this promise to God came another promise that I will not spend my days worrying about whether or not I will ever get married. Worrying about that alone was wearing me out, especially since I have surrendered to be a missionary and there is a big possibility that I could be on a mission field without a husband.

While I still wonder about my future and still dream of marriage and a family, I am not making myself sick over it anymore. I always had a low self-esteem because of my physical appearance, and I still struggle with it at times, but just knowing that God truly has control over me, I am not worried about what might be next. That has always been my biggest problem: trying to figure out God and His plans. So, I ask God all the time to take away my desires and replace them with His. He has done so...He has taken away MY desire for marriage and replaced it with HIS. The difference is incredible! I literally don’t have to worry! Before I handed everything to Him, I couldn’t imagine what it would be like to be free from so many thoughts and worries. Now, I don’t see how I survived before! He really CAN handle everything, He really IS there for me, and He really WANTS me to live a better life!

One thing that has changed my view about purity and commitment in recent times was having an opportunity to go to an Eric and Leslie Ludy conference and hear the way they explain purity. Even though I made the commitment at 18 to save my kiss, body, and heart, these folks really encouraged me in a new way. At the conference, Eric Ludy made two comments that I hope never to forget. One of them was “Never pitch your tent.” Boy, was that a big problem for me! So many times I just settle with what I think is best, when there is actually something better God wants to show me. Another thing he said was “Your future spouse is alive right now!” Now, this was a little weird when I first heard it. Of course, my future husband is alive right now! As he went on, Eric Ludy explained that somewhere in the world, the person that God has for us is alive and is possibly going through the same things that we are. Some of the same difficulties, hopes, plans, dreams, worries…your future spouse is probably thinking like you! Then, Ludy said “Is it possible to live for and to be in love your spouse before you even know/meet them?” When he said that, God whispered to me and “Sarah, I want to live for your husband right now as if you are already married.” Woah…this is huge.

I started changing things big time after that. I look at things differently, think of things differently, and live differently. I am doing my best right now to live for my husband in every possible way to honor him. I am falling in love with him by falling more in love with Jesus Christ. And I have no clue who he is! I pray for him all the time. Some of the specific things I pray for are: “God, please show my husband Your love today. Please help him with whatever his problem may be right now. Please, comfort him in his pain right now. Please let him know just how close You are to him and how You are always there for him. Please help him to have a good night’s rest and a good day tomorrow. Please give him a hug from me and let him know that I am praying for him.” I pray all of this, and so much more. Pretty much anything I would pray for myself or a friend, I pray about for my husband. That’s a lot of praying. If there is one thing that has improved in my Christian walk, it’s my prayer life.

One of the best ways that I can feel close to my future husband is to study the Word. For some reason, every time I find some new discovery in the Bible or some new concept, I can’t help but think about him and whether or not he has discovered the things I have. I wonder what he may have found in the Scriptures that I have not. Things like that are what I wonder about, rather than worrying about so many trivial things that I did before. It’s such a relief!

There are still times when I distress over what is next so I have to give it all to God…again. My human nature wants to pick up my worries and burdens all over again and start lugging them around. However, as soon as I feel that burden on my shoulder, I’m like “Woah, Okay God, You can have them back!” And He is so faithful to help me out.

I am still waiting on him, I am still praying for him, and I am falling in love with him more and more because I have found my true Love, Jesus Christ. I want to be so close to Jesus that my husband has to seek Him to get to me. So, me and Jesus are hanging out. God has given me this period of being single for a reason: He wants me to serve him and be in his perfect will. There is a song by John Waller called ‘While I’m Waiting.’ The lyrics to the first part of the chorus mirror what I always want to do:

I will move ahead, bold and confident.
Taking every step in obedience,
While I’m waiting,
I will serve You while I’m waiting.

Have a testimony to share about how God is writing your love story?

Want to encourage others to wait on His timing?

Share it with us by emailing it to: thekingsbride@ymail.com

Skills in Singleness

2011-06-15T15:15:00.000-07:00

Learn to be a person of prayer (1Tim 2:1-8)
Too few of us, myself included, have established strong prayer lives–yet Paul states that this is essential for living a quiet and peaceable life in all godliness and reverence.

Learn modesty, good works, and submission (1 Tim 2:9-14)
Women are encouraged to adorn themselves with modesty, with good works, and with submission. This is a skill we can grow in; even as married women.

Learn discernment (1 Tim 4:7-8, 6:20-21; 2 Tim 2:15-19)
Paul commands Timothy to “reject profane and old wives’ fables, and exercise [himself] toward godliness.” So we too, would do well to develop discernment in doctrine and practice.

Learn to walk in purity (I Tim 4:12, 5:22; 2 Tim 2:21-22)
Contrary to the depraved world in which we live, where singles are encouraged to do whatever they like, Christian singles are called to live lives of purity.

Devote yourself to the Word of God (1 Tim 4:13,15-16; 2 Tim 1:13-14, 4:2-4)
I believe single adults have a unique opportunity to dig down deep into the Word of God – both reading it, speaking it, and doing it. Paul says singles are not distracted–what better time to “give attention” to the Word?

Learn to walk in your gifts (1Tim 4:14; 2 Tim 1:6, 4:5)
Singleness is also a great time to learn what your gifts are and to begin to practice them. Don’t sit around and wait until you are married to get involved within your local church and your community. Ask God what role He would have you play–and get doing it. Don’t waste your singleness by living only for your own pleasure.

Develop healthy relationships (1Tim 5:1-2)
Paul encourages Timothy to develop healthy relationship with older men and older women (treating them as parents) and with younger men and women (treating them as brothers and sisters). We can learn how to glorify God and honor others in our relationships.

Learn contentment (1 Tim 6:6-10)
Contentment goes further than singleness. We can learn to be content with our circumstances, with our possessions, with our relationships, etc.

Be discipled and disciple someone (2 Tim 2:2)
Paul encourages Timothy to take what he (Timothy) has learned from him (Paul) and to teach it to others. Timothy is one link in the chain of making disciples. In the same way, we ought to be links in the chain of discipleship. Seek out older believers who can mentor you. Don’t wait until you have kids of your own to begin to pass along what has been entrusted to you. Find a younger man, a younger woman, a child, that you can commit the word of God to. I promise you won’t regret it.

Maintain your focus (2 Tim 2:3-7, 4:5)
Endure hardship. Resist temptation. Look forward to the prize. Don’t let either the trials or the pleasures of this world distract you from the treasure that is Christ Jesus.

Learn humility (2 Tim 2:24-26)
This one gets me every time. Learn humility–avoiding worthless disputes. Being gentle. It’s tough, but it’s necessary.

Recognize that singleness is not a sit-on-your-hands-until-something-better-comes-along time. Singleness is a time when we should be fully focused on God and on advancing His kingdom. Singleness is a time when we can develop our relationships with God, with His body, and to win the lost. Singleness is a time to grow in godly character and to be conformed into the image of Christ. Don’t waste your singleness.

My Wedding Remembered

2011-06-14T12:50:00.000-07:00

A sweet friend made this slideshow of Grant's and my wedding last spring. It was such a blessing to view and I thought I would share.

P.S. The song is "Bless This Man" by Katie Drake

Heavenly Love Stories: Jason & Jessica

2011-06-11T12:11:00.000-07:00

Jason and Jessica

September 12, 2009

As told by Jessica:

I always hoped that God would bring me a knight in shining armor one day who would sweep me off my feet, and we would live happily ever after. God did, in fact, do just that, but it wouldn’t have been possible if I had not saved myself for my man. Sexual purity, yes that is important, but really I’m speaking of purity as a whole in relation to men.

I know many girls who are sexually pure, but emotionally they are soaring high or crashing in rocks around this man who they have no realistic reason to believe is to be their prince charming. I am sure most, if not all girls, have been in this situation before. Don’t waste your emotions. Remember, there is only ONE man for you. If he is undetermined, then act as if such is true. God created women to be emotional creatures, and that is a very good thing. You just need to use your emotions for things that matter, and save your special emotions for the man you will marry one day. The more you give yourself, emotionally or physically, to a man, the more you are taking away from what you will give your husband one day. I made a commitment to God when I was 15, to save myself physically and emotionally for my husband, to the point of not kissing before my wedding day, and guarding my heart against my emotions.

When I was 17, I asked that God would put me asleep toward men until he was ready to bring me my husband. I didn’t want to worry about it. I didn’t want to be interested. I didn’t want to waste my emotions on someone before the right one came along. As it turned out, I didn’t have a long wait.

The first time I saw Jason he came to a Bible study at my house. A friend brought him as a guest. I was 18. I had heard a lot about him from friends and family. I introduced myself and made cordial conversation, but didn’t think anything else about it. Apparently, he didn’t either. It was months before he came back, and he had forgotten all about my existence. I noticed he was nice this time. He noticed me as well, but that is as far as it went. My Dad invited him to lunch, and Jason obliged. My Dad is a CPA and I worked in the office with him. When Jason came in for lunch, I was the receptionist in the office. I generally was able to send people in to Dad with little interaction required from me, but Jason stayed 3 hours after lunchtime talking to Dad. Whenever Dad got a client, Jason would come out to my desk and talk to me. Then he was back in Dad’s office. I thought this was very strange as Dad frequently had lunch appointments and they never stayed over 3 hours like that. Probably half of the three hours Dad had a client and Jason was talking to me. Somehow we had plenty to talk about, and I discovered I had a lot more in common with this 30 year old man then I had suspected. Before he left, I asked for his email address. I was going to put him on our update mail out list that I handled for my family. He asked for mine in return and I thought, “Well, I didn’t mean it like THAT. I was just going to add him to my updates. I’m sure he felt like he had to ask for mine out of courtesy since I asked for his.” How surprised I was to get an email from him that very night. “Hmm, that is interesting,” I thought, “I’ll wait a few days to respond.”

Wait we did. For about 5 months we emailed a couple of times a week, and saw each other seldom. I was certain that he was just like all the other normal guys. It was just a matter of proving it to myself by waiting for time to expose his true character. Of course we would never work. Always assume he’s guilty until proven innocent. My sister was getting married. By that time our emails were still about twice a week, but beginning to get very deep in content. I had deep conversations with a lot of people, so I tried not to think anything about it. A friend from out of state was down for the wedding, and she asked, “Who is this guy who is so interested in you, watching you, and following you around all the time??” I was thinking, “Who is she talking about?? Surely she doesn’t mean Jason. I cannot even tell if he likes me or not.” Yet, she was speaking of him. I thought I might like him a little too, but I didn’t know. I wasn’t going to waste my emotions, so moving on… Another 3 months passed, and he started inviting me and members of my family to his place to do things with him occasionally.

The next 3 months were very interesting. He started emailing every night, and I started seeing him about every couple of weeks. We had been friends talking for almost a year, and I was getting very impressed with this man. His character, the things I had seen from him were admirable, and I couldn’t find one important thing on which we disagreed. We had talked about a slew of issues, and somehow he had such different views that aligned with mine perfectly. My Dad and he were good friends, and Dad seemed to approve of him entirely. One day while I was praying, I had an overwhelming feeling that I needed to pray that God would be making my future husband into a man of prayer. I prayed for him often, so that wasn’t such a big deal. A couple of weeks later, I was listening to Dad and Jason talk. Dad asked Jason what God had been teaching him about lately. Jason said that he was learning about prayer. He had been studying and reading books about prayer and trying to increase the depth and consistency of his prayer life. I was shaken because I realized that things needed to stop now if he was not the man for me or it would be very difficult for me to save my emotions. I prayed that God would send something immediately to show me if it wasn’t right, and that he would burden me and him about it and make us not be able to sleep, that we would be so disturbed if we weren’t right for each other. I didn’t want to develop an emotional attachment that couldn’t last. I prayed that God would cause whatever circumstances necessary to draw us together if we were to get married. I felt so much distance from Jason I felt like it would have to be something big if that were to happen, and I wasn’t really expecting the stick to fall that way.

To my amazement it was something big. A week later, Jason’s grandpa died suddenly. Everyone was heartbroken and traumatized, but somehow this is just what God used to bring us together. Whatever that wall was in Jason fell, and we were suddenly connecting on a much deeper level. I had so much peace about it, but still we had to discuss many things before I was any deeper connected. I think we were both ready to settle questions we had or drop things completely. It was Christmas and we found ourselves talking about issues that mattered to us in our future family. “If I were to marry someone I would want him/her to want to raise a family in this way, if you disagree with that, we need to move on.” I think I had a lot more questions and concerns than he did, but somehow they all got resolved. What we assumed might be the end, was instead a delightful conversation.

I was for certain mentally that our views were similar and that he would make a good husband and father. It seemed we would be compatible…But I was not quite ready to say I was for certain that Jason was God’s man for me. I knew that I couldn’t marry somebody if I wasn’t for sure he was the one God had for me. I would be under his authority my whole earthly life, and a wrong choice would be a very bad mistake. A couple of more months passed. During this time, we hardly saw each other, but continued to email every night. One night I was driving around town on some errands, and I started praying. For some reason I was praying for “us” and not for “me”. I got very annoyed with myself and asked God to show me once and for all if he was the one for me. Suddenly, I realized that if I were going to marry someone, I would really have to love them, like Christ loves me. I began to pray that if we weren’t to be married, I would grow stale to him. I also asked that if we were to be married, God would fill me with HIS love for him. I know marriage is hard and you have to have the love of Christ for that person if you are going to make it with flying colors. I thought that if God were to give me His love for Jason, it would be a gradual thing, and I wouldn’t notice it for at least a few more months. Even as I was still saying the prayer, I felt God place His love in my heart. I did! It was an overwhelming feeling! I began to cry and say that I loved him. The whole car had a different feeling in it of the Spirit. It was incredible! That was it! I was sure he was the one. I knew that after we got married, I could never convince myself that I had made a mistake.

Two more months passed and nothing happened. My sisters and Mom began to voice their uneasiness that I was too emotionally involved when he hadn’t committed to anything. I tried to thwart their concerns, but it was in vain. It was now April and seemed like it had been an eternity of dodging questions. Four months after our “marriage talk” we were still not a couple. I wanted my Dad to be involved and approve of my marriage partner. We had talked about it all along, and I was always seeking his advice about what boundaries I needed to set and the things I needed to do or not do. He was a huge blessing in trying to figure out where I needed to be. Also I wanted him to give his approval to me and my future spouse by giving his blessing and consent to our marriage when the time came. I also wanted to get his blessing for even being in a relationship. We called it courting, because it wasn’t anything like regular dating. We thought it deserved a special title to set it apart. Jason agreed that is the way it should be, so now I was just playing the waiting game. My birthday, April 18, was the blessed day. Jason came, hung out all day, and brought me a diamond cross necklace. In the middle of the afternoon he asked Dad if he would go with him for a walk. I knew what that meant! I could hardly wait for them to get back. That day began our courtship and it lasted a grand total of 2 months. This was exciting because I was allowed to go to his place on some weekends and be with him and his family. Before this we hardly ever got an opportunity to be together. We also started talking on the phone, which was a new privilege.

In June, Jason asked me to be his wife and we were official engaged. We were married 3 months later on Sept, 12… 2 years after we met. He is the most romantic, God- fearing man, and the perfect match for me. We have been married over a year now, and have a baby boy. I’m so happy that God has made me a woman, and that I have the wonderful responsibility of helping Jason and raising godly children. I pray that I will follow God all the days of my life, and that my children, grandchildren, and great-grandchildren will do the same.

Have a testimony to share about how God has written

(or is writing!) your love story?

Share it with us by emailing it to: thekingsbride@ymail.com

Popular or Pure?

2011-05-18T20:09:00.000-07:00

“The world has enough women who are popular. It needs more who are pure. We need women, and men too, who would rather be morally right than socially correct.” - Peter Marshall

A Year of Marriage

2011-04-21T11:34:00.001-07:00

I can't believe it's been a year since I stood before Grant in a white wedding gown. SO much has happened!...the biggest thing being, of course, our baby boy who arrived just four days before our anniversary!

Sunday was our first anniversary. It was very different from what I had expected. I didn't expect to be shortly home from the hospital with a tiny little bundle in my arms. But I also didn't expect the day to be so sweet. Both Grant's Mom and my Mom fixed us a romantic dinner, took care of Nathan for us for hours, and hid themselves in the nursery while we enjoyed some time alone to reflect back on the past year. Of course, it wasn't long before we both tip-toed into the nursery to try to pull our baby away from two giddy grandmothers!

A lot can happen in one year. In one years' time, Grant and I both learned an awful lot. We had our share of ups and downs. We had some amazingly sweet and beautiful moments together! We had road trips, revivals, prison meetings, friends gatherings, a mission trip to Israel, and experienced pregnancy and the first chapter of parenthood together.

The years ahead look blurry and I can't see what's up ahead any more than he can. But we both know that the Lord can see....and He is in control. He blessed us with a glorious first year together....and I can't wait for many more up ahead in the years to come.

A Year Ago

2011-04-17T15:48:00.000-07:00

Today marks one year since I stood in a pretty white gown before a handsome fella and exchanged rings, vows, and a totally-worth-waiting-for kiss! Today is my anniversary.

Happy Anniversary, to my husband, Grant!

Heavenly Love Stories: Caleb & Anna

2011-04-11T07:58:00.000-07:00

Caleb and Anna

July 7, 2007

As told by Anna:
Our story started when I was 3 years old and Caleb was 4 years old. My family found a little stray puppy in our yard that was starving and we took him in. He had a heart shape mark right in the middle of his forehead so we ended up calling him Valentine. I LOVED that dog. I have always been more of a cat person but this dog was mine (or so I thought). I’m not sure exactly the reason why we couldn’t keep him but I know my parents put an ad in the local paper for a “Free Puppy”. A few days after they put the ad up, a young couple with a little boy about my age came to look at Valentine. They were looking for a dog that was good with children. My parents told them how good he was with kids, so they said they would take him. I cried and cried over that dog, but my parents said that he was going to a good home with people who would love him.

Several years went by…I went through middle school and then finally made it to high school. I was absolutely terrified. Older kids everywhere and me an outcast. I watched how girls my age would change boyfriends like they would change their socks and I did not want to be like that. I never dated during my high school years, I only had a couple of crushes that I regret even wasting my time with. I remember praying that God would help me find someone He thought was right for me. Someone that He had already picked out. I thought I had in mind what I wanted him to look like or be….but the Lord had something else in store. Something MUCH better then a silly high school crush.

One of my close friends was dating this guy named Caleb. He was super funny and super nice.…and best of all, he was a Christian. He always made me smile. I just thought he was a pretty good guy and she was lucky to have him. I remember going with them to the movies or a youth outing and loving hanging out with him! I remember thinking I wish I could find someone like him! They dated a couple of years…then they broke up. I already had him on my Instant Messenger so we started to talk more after they broke up….just about life in general. This was the summer of 2003.

We talked online for about 3 months, then we started calling each other. I remember talking one night online and he said “Do you remember ever having a dog named Valentine?” I said yes. How did he know?! He said that he was the little boy that ended up getting him. I was in shock! How awesome was that?! He told me that Valentine had saved his life after they got him. Caleb was playing outside and Valentine all of a sudden bit his pants and started dragging him away from where he was. Come to find out he was dragging him away from a rattlesnake that was about to strike Caleb. If he hadn’t have had that little dog around that snake would have bit him, and no telling what would have happened to him.

After a few more months, we gradually started hanging out more. When he came over to my house for the first time, my parents absolutely LOVED him. He and my dad would get into Bible talk with each other…just for my dad to know where he stood and what exactly he believed. He would come over for 30 minutes or so and we would just talk or he would invite me out to watch a movie. We were just having a good time. I considered him to be one of my best friends. I could talk to him about anything! Plus he was a good Christian guy, which was hard to find. Most guys just said they were but never lived it. Caleb actually lived it. Plus, his family was so sweet! They would invite me over for supper or to just come over. He told me they had never done that with any of his friends before. I felt special!

On February 14, 2004, I was working in my office and the door opened and this woman came in with the most beautiful arrangement of flowers in her arms. Purple irises, red tulips, baby’s breath….it was HUGE. I had NEVER gotten anything like this before in my life! I asked in shock, “Is this for me!?” She said yes! I saw an envelope and looked inside to see a letter. It was so sweet and genuine about how much he loved being with me, how he cared about me and how he wanted to get me my favorite flowers and it went on and on. A LOVE letter for me?!?! Wow, was all I could think. I was absolutely terrified to think he wanted to be more than friends with me. I didn’t want to end up like everyone else I knew….dating then breaking up, then dating a new guy, then breaking up. I wanted to give all my love to the one guy God had picked out for me. Not share it with random guys for “a limited time only”. I had to trust God in what He was doing in our relationship. I didn’t need to trust in how I felt. If I had gone with my feelings, no telling what could have happened. Probably nothing good! No one had ever done anything like this before for me. I had no idea how I was going to respond to him. I ended up calling him…scared to death. I thanked him and thanked him for the beautiful flowers.

We talked several times after that. On March 5, 2004. He officially asked me out on a date. I was super excited and nervous! He took me out to Applebee’s and then we went to see a movie. It was so much fun! I knew he was the one for me! Then on March 9, 2004, he came over to my house for supper and he officially asked me to be his girlfriend. I was beaming and so happy! My parents were thrilled!

We had been dating for almost 2 months when he told me he loved me. What a surprise to me! I had never heard those words before (besides from family of course) and it was so natural sounding saying it back.

In July 2004 he interviewed for a job about an hour and a half away. Of course he got it. We prayed whether or not we should stay together in a long distance relationship. We decided to stick to it. God had a plan for us! We dated for 2 years like this, only seeing each other three or four times a month. It worked out though…we would call each other whenever one of us was heading to bed. We would talk until one of us got sleepy…telling each other about our day, what different Bible study groups he was going to, just everything in that day crammed in an hour or so. Every day we did this for two solid years. It was way worth it! I loved hearing more and more about him. Both of us also started our own Christian blogs during this time. It was awesome reading some of his posts. He was so inspirational to me.

One afternoon, on May 25, 2006, we were talking on the phone after he had gotten off from work. Before I knew it, he was pulling up in my driveway. I was shocked and very excited! I rushed to my room to change clothes…and while I was doing that he was asking my dad for permission to marry me. Of course my dad said yes! Caleb was like another son to him! I went into the living room and I noticed my parents acting weird. Caleb asked me to close my eyes, so I did. I was wondering what he was up too. When he had me open them, there he was on one knee asking me to marry him! I was so shocked!! My parents were beaming and poor Caleb was shaking like a leaf! I said yes while tears of joy came streaming down my face. It was the best moment.

On July 7, 2007, we were married in front of 200 plus of our friends and family. It was so beautiful! I am so glad that I saved all of myself for my one true love! I hope and pray other girls will do the same. It is so worth it! Make God the center of your relationship and marriage. Trust in Him and not on what you “feel” is the right thing to do. Waiting for the right guy is hard to do but when he finally comes it will be well worth the wait!

Have a testimony to share about how God has written
(or is writing!) your love story?

Share it with us by emailing it to: thekingsbride@ymail.com

Heavenly Love Stories: Isaac & Rachelle

2011-04-05T11:59:00.000-07:00

Isaac and Rachelle

May 31, 2008

Isaac: It all started when I accidentally created two characters called Pip & Squeak and started doing comedy blogs with them.

Rachelle: About the same time, my sister Jessica and I started posting our thoughts online, and our blogs were placed on a list of Christian blogsites. Then one day I was breezing through the blogs on this list when I ran across one by a guy in a cowboy hat who's occupation was "missionary" and who's location was "Utah." I was quite bothered. Imagine that - a redneck Mormon missionary on Gerry's list of Christian sites. I thought he checked these sites out before he linked to them. Disturbing. Of course, I left that blog as quickly as possible. But somewhere down the road I forgot my first impression and on October 28, 2005, I visited the cowboy's blog again. This time, I hung around long enough to realize that this guy was no Mormon. His doctrine was sound. And his posts were pretty interesting. He had a comedy column called "Pip and Squeak" and I left him a quick comment and signed up to receive a notice when he released new comedy posts.

Isaac: I had a lot of people who signed my guest book to receive notifications when I published a new comedy blog. Rachelle was just another person, however, I always tried to leave a nice comment of some kind in return if they left me a comment. So I visited Rachelle's site. I remember thinking that she was definitely different; this was not the main stream Christian site I was used to seeing. I was curious, but didn't bother to look around too much; I simply wrote a comment and left.

Rachelle: Jessica signed up for Isaac's comedy posts too, and we began to get notifications from Isaac every time he published a new comedy post... but we noticed that he never commented on our blogs. He simply commented about his "new post" and left. It began to annoy us - didn't this guy talk? And didn't he know it was rude to not comment on our blogs when it was obvious he had visited our sites? We decided we were going to make him talk, so we began to leave him comments regularly.

Isaac: The truth was that I had a list of dozens of sites to visit to notify them of a comedy blog post, so I would just post a simple notice that would work for everyone. Eventually Rachelle and Jessica commented on one of my spiritual blogs, which got my attention. So I began to look around their sites more and we commented back and forth for about two months. Eventually, my curiosity got the better of me, and I asked what church they attended. Jessica wrote me back a comment saying that was too long to answer in a blog comment, and left me her's and Rachelle's instant messenger addresses. I added them the week before Christmas. Jessica and I talked a few hours that week about our respective churches, and beliefs. A week later, on the Saturday before Christmas in 2005, Rachelle signed in. I thought I would be polite and just say hi, and then go on my way...right?

Rachelle: I wasn't excited about this stranger adding me to his instant messenger. I was really hoping I wouldn't have to talk to him. I didn't have any desire to start a friendship with a guy I didn't know who I would have to keep up with - my life was complicated enough already! A few days before Christmas, I signed into my MSN messenger right after lunch and saw that the cowboy was online. I didn't say anything, and just hoped he wouldn't start a conversation. He said hi. We started talking... and before I knew it Mom was calling me to come help with dinner.

Isaac: I said goodbye to her...five and a half hours later. I'd never spent that long talking to a girl in a single setting in my life! *fast forwards* Well, we started talking, quite a bit actually. I also started getting to know her siblings somewhat better. About the middle of January 2006, I e-mailed her Dad to make sure he was alright with a stranger from the land of Utah talking to his children. After a few e-mails, he gave his approval. I also told my parents about the family I had met. When Mom asked me if I might ever be interested in something more with Rachelle, I laughed and said "Mom! She is three years older then me!" Obviously that was enough to throw out the idea instantly, right? Mom shot right back, "Well you remember So and So; she is seven years older then he is." Our age difference was never an issue again.

Rachelle: Isaac and I talked about a lot of deep topics during the next couple months. We developed a great friendship!

Isaac: In mid-March I finished talking to Rachelle one evening, and as I got ready for bed I was thinking about how it would be nice to meet her and her family (as I was talking with all of them). I immediately threw out the idea. It wouldn't happen. I tried to go to sleep, but the thought kept returning. Finally, desperate to get some sleep, I said something to the effect of, "It will never happen, God, and just to prove it, here are three things that would have to happen before it could: #1. I would want an invitation from her father. #2. I would need to know I had the finances for the trip. #3. I would want my parents to be alright with it." I promptly went to sleep. I was about to learn a lesson: One should be careful when he challenges God. The next morning, unsolicited into my inbox came an invitation from Rachelle's father to visit the family. I was like, "That was not supposed to happen, God, hello?" However, since it had, I thought I would check on the finances. I had already set aside an amount for my summer travel (to a mission conference), and lo and behold, it was only a few dollars more to add the extra stop to visit Rachelle's family. Two down, one to go. I knew I had to do it, but I dreaded it, because I knew it would NEVER happen, and I'd look silly for asking. Well, I finally got up the courage to mention it to Mom, who (thank you, Mom) mentioned it to Dad. Dad took me to lunch, and told me his and Mom's concerns, and then said that I should do what the Lord was leading me to do, and as long as I was in the Lord's will, they would be behind me on it. So, 48 hours after my "never happen" challenge to God, I was buying a plane ticket to see Rachelle and her family.

Rachelle: I guess we should add at this point that Isaac and I had both decided some time before we began talking to each other that we would never have a romantic relationship with someone we had never met in real life. We both thought that a solely online friendship would not be enough for us to get to know someone enough to consider a serious romantic involvement. But, from April to May 2006, Isaac and I both did a lot of intentional ignoring ("not thinking!") about the obvious ways that we were fitted for each other. In May 2006, we met for the first time. Isaac was everything I expected... really he was very much like I expected and I was surprised at how accurate an impression I'd had from our online conversations.

Isaac: I was delighted to meet the Traylor family, they were all a lot of fun and were just like I had expected from our online conversations. In fact, when I stepped off the plane, I thought I had stepped into one of their pictures! I had no intention of expressing interest in any girl at that point. I could barely believe I was even meeting the Traylor family in real life.

Rachelle: I thought that Isaac was a WONDERFUL guy... and very much the kind of guy that I could see myself having a future with. But by Saturday night, it was very obvious that he was here with only one purpose in mind - hanging out with Christian friends. He was obviously not interested in me beyond that. I was actually rather disappointed, but on Saturday night, I talked to the Lord about how He knew that my life was in His hands. I told Him that it obviously wasn't in His plan for Isaac and I to have anything more than friendship, and that I would just be thankful for the awesome friendship. Once I had that settled in my mind, I was ready to concentrate on friendship... and then came Monday night.

Isaac: While attending college, Rachelle had lived with a wonderful couple who had taken her under their wing, and had been very much apart of her life. Upon hearing that some strange guy was coming to visit, they had offered to take Rachelle, myself, and Rachelle's brother to dinner one night. We met them at a small Chinese restaurant in town and enjoyed getting to know to each other. However, the conversation soon turned as the couple began questioning me concerning my spiritual walk and character, obviously testing me to see if I was made of the material that was worthy of Rachelle. They then turned and began asking Rachelle about her interest in me. To make a long story short, before the conversation was over, we had both admitted, without realizing it, that we were both interested in the other.

Rachelle: I knew something had happened that night, but I wasn't sure what. I was nervous when we left the restaurant. We walked to the truck... my brother Jonathan got in on the driver's side and Isaac put his hand on the door handle to let me in my side. But then he stopped and turned to me and said, "Rachelle, we HAVE to talk." My stomach went 'flip-flop.' I nodded and quickly jumped in the vehicle. That night I went straight to my room. I called Mom in and told her that Isaac wanted to TALK about something... *ahem* I asked her if she thought I should let him, and she said yes. I was totally nervous, but wanted to hear him out. I didn't sleep much that night.

Isaac: I went back to the room that had been loaned me during the visit, and as I turned out the light I realized that I was about to do something that I'd never done before, something that was totally out of character for me. I was about to express interest in a girl! The idea was totally new and I didn't even know what to think about it. I'd never even been around girls much, let alone been interested in one. Finally, I got down on my knees and prayed about it, then decided that there were a few things I needed to ask Rachelle before I expressed interest in her.

Rachelle: Tuesday morning finally dawned. I was still nervous. About 10AM, Isaac and I sat down to talk, but we both had too much nervous energy to sit still, so we decided to take a walk in the park.

Isaac: We talked about the things I'd prayed about the previous night and I was comfortable with her answers. I then told her that I didn't believe in playing games, that I thought the only reason a couple should consider anything more then friendship was for the purpose of seeing if God meant that person for them to marry. She agreed. I then took a deep breath...worked up my nerve, and then asked her if she would be interested in taking the next step in our relationship and seeing if God had something more in store for us together. I'll never forget her words. She, rather nervously, said "I...think....so."

Rachelle: Since this was new to Isaac and I, we didn't have a clear idea about how things should work. We did know one thing - we needed to talk to our parents. In fact, Isaac suggested that we talk to my parents that very night. When the four of us sat down and Isaac told my parents that he and I were interested in each other, I don't know who was more nervous - him or my dad. I don't think my parents knew what to think about this guy who they barely knew being interested in one of their daughters. He sure talked the talk, but could he live what he spoke? They felt that they needed to know. In the meantime they were concerned that we might get emotionally involved and not make a spiritually discerned decision concerning our futures... so they asked that we only have contact once a month, through letters.

Isaac: I understood their position, and with a glance at Rachelle, I told them we would be comply.

Rachelle: The next months were times of proving... demonstrating that were we both seeking the Lord's will about this relationship.

Isaac: The highlight of every month was that packet of letters. As the months passed, her parents had opportunities to hear how I responded in many different kinds of circumstances, and they became more and more comfortable with me. I was also able to go down for a visit in October 2006. Of course we had a wonderful time. In February 2007, my parents (who had guessed I would come back in June 2006 with a girlfriend) and my elders decided it was time they started talking with Rachelle's father. Over several phone conversations, Rachelle's parents became comfortable enough with me to be fine with us using instant messenger again and also having one phone call a week. Rachelle and I were very excited! We thought we'd been given a piece of heaven. We spent much time seeking the Lord for the next several months.

Rachelle: That's really the key to all this! Isaac and I each spent hours in prayer, asking the Lord to confirm His will and to show it to each of us and our parents. After 10 months apart, Isaac and I were able to have two visits in the span of two months during July and August 2007. At the end of the August 2007 trip, my parents told Isaac and I that we had their blessing on marriage if that was the way the Lord led us.

Isaac: At the end of the August trip, we began planning for Rachelle to visit Utah. I was sure this was the girl I wanted to marry. Rachelle was a little less sure and wanted to meet my family before she made her choice about marrying me.

Rachelle: The Lord had been leading me very clearly towards a future with Isaac, but I hadn't had peace about a final decision. I knew that I needed to meet Isaac's family (mostly to see him in his environment and see his background) before I knew for sure. Towards the end of October 2007, I made the trip... and found my answer. It was obvious within the first few days of my visit that Isaac was the man the Lord had chosen for me. My parents joined me in Utah on the first of November. We had a wonderful time of fellowship with the Wardell family and their local Christian fellowship. I enjoyed getting to know them all, especially Isaac's family. On November 4, my parents gave Isaac the "key" to my heart. It was a bittersweet moment that was full of meaning.

Isaac: Over the next couple of months I had a great time planning my proposal to Rachelle. On December 15, 2007, in the same park where I first expressed interest in her, I asked Rachelle to be my wife.

Rachelle: It was the most romantic and wonderful proposal in history, and I was happy and proud to say yes.

Isaac and Rachelle were married May 31st 2008 in a sweet ceremony in which they shared their first kiss together. They are both amazed and awed at the beauty of the way God has made their dreams come true.

Have a testimony to share about how God has written
(or is writing!) your love story?

Share it with us by emailing it to: thekingsbride@ymail.com

Let Him Write

2011-04-01T11:27:00.000-07:00

There was an 18 year old girl who was envied by many of her friends. She was popular, physically beautiful, pursued by many boys in school and at Church. She was funny, outgoing, and involved in various activities in the community. She was also mischievous, seductive, and beguiling. She used her outer beauty to entice the men around her. She used her charm to get exactly what she wanted. She used her sense of humor to glaze over and camouflage her recklessness and sin. Though she grew up in Church and professed to be a Christian, she was never seen telling anyone about Jesus, reaching out to others in need, or living a life of purity and set-apartness. What happened to this girl? She went from one boy to another. She gave all that was pure and innocent and sacred away. No strings attached. Not much concern or shame over all that she threw away. Years wasted and far too much gone forever...

There was another 18 year old girl. She, too, grew up in Church and professed Christ. She was physically gorgeous and inwardly beautiful. She was popular and regularly in the minds of many guys. She was funny and smart and down to earth, involved in as many things as she could be. She was gracious, kind, easy to get along with and viewed by all as a true and genuine friend. Along with all those attributes, she was known to be vocal about her love for Jesus, seen by many going down the streets telling people about what He had done in her life. She went on mission trips and reached out to the poor and homeless. Though plenty of men wanted her, she never used her beauty or her charm to entice them in. Her goal was to be set-apart, pure, noble, and honourable; keeping everything special and innocent sacred.

The above stories are true stories about real girls.

The first girl isn't just one person, but many friends in my past. As I went through my teenage years, one by one, far too many of my friends sank down into the common "21st Century Girl" who used everything God gave them to allure men into their beds.

The second girl, I am proud to say, is my sister. As the world turns more ungodly and the women of this generation become exceedingly crude and seductive, it appears that my sister (and many more just like her) rise higher and higher, pursuing a consecrated life with more zeal than before. And I am inspired more and more.

Purity has been my platform for years. Now that I am married and about to have a little one, I am all the more passionate about getting this message out to all who have ears to hear: Give Jesus the pen of your life. Then step back and let Him write.

There are too many like the first girl.

There are too few like my sister and those like her.

There are too many who refuse to let God have control of their love life and decide to take their high school and college years and have fun. Go out, date, experience heartbreak, toy with fire, fall into temptation, and probably lose their innocence and maybe even wind up with a pregnancy or STD. And why? All in the name of "normal."

There are too few who stand up and say, "The God who gave all for me, will now have MY all....my love life included." Rejecting the pattern of divorce training (hooking up, breaking up, hooking up, breaking up) and refusing to toy with hearts and minds is, surprisingly, looked down upon and deemed "unrealistic." Choosing to develop real friendships that go beyond "who-likes-who," and living in such a way that other stop and watch is noted as "weird." Well.....Jesus was quite different. He was very much set-apart. He went against society. He pursued higher things and greater purposes. So I say, "bring on the weirdness!" And on a side note, it is not only possible, but VERY realistic in the eyes of God to use your single years as a gift from God, "redeeming the time" and making it count for something eternal.

When I stood before my groom on my wedding day, almost a year ago, it was the most sobering thrill of my life to be able to say, "I have no baggage from past relationships. I have no one to compare to. I don't have a history of hooking up, breaking up, and trashing your name with my friends. No one has had what YOU now have. What God created as sacred and innocent and pure has been preserved for you, and you alone." How I wish EVERYONE could say those words!

The first girl, sadly, will not be able to say that.

The second? Most definitely! And I can already hear the angels rejoicing and see the Lord smiling down.

So what I would like to say to each girl (and guy!) is this: Give Jesus the pen, then step back and let Him write.

Dear Sisters

2011-02-17T08:43:00.000-08:00

Since I have been married, several single sisters have had many questions for me.

Is waiting worth it? What can I do now when I feel alone? Is there really someone out there for me?

With Valentine's Day just ending, I know many of you who are waiting for your Prince Charming may be feeling down and lonely. Some of you might have a boyfriend and are wondering if waiting is really worth it in the end. Well my sisters, I have some things to say to you....

Dear Sisters,

As I sit here in the morning light, God is reminding me of how faithful He is. He has given me a new day. He has given me His love and salvation. He has given me a wonderful family and great friends. He has given me an amazing husband who is the love of my life and, to top it off, He has even given me a baby boy on the way! I do not know all of you, nor do I know what you go through in your day-to-day life; your ups and your downs. I do not know your life's ambitions and I don't know the deepest desires of your heart. But I can guess that you desire love. You desire a knight in shining armor. You long for a "happily ever after" kind of love story. After all, that is how our God created you.

What can I possibly say to you that would accurately describe how big our God is? It amazes me that when I was 15 years old, single, and wondering if I would ever find true love, God was orchestrating a beautiful story up ahead of me. And I had no idea! When I met my husband-to-be when I was 21 years old, little did I know that my Lord was smiling down, knowing that I wouldn't catch on to His master plan until over a year later! God is much bigger than our minds can possibly fathom. I know you may be sitting there wondering if He has forgotten you or if He really cares about your relationship status. I assure you that He has not forgotten you, and I can testify that He does care, even about the most minute details of your life. That's the kind of God He is. I used to wonder the same things you may have wondered about. I wanted a noble Knight to charge into my life and win my heart. I wanted a fairytale story and I wanted a love worth waiting for. I wondered if I would actually get what I dreamed and prayed for. I doubted God's faithfulness, but He proved me wrong!

How could I possibly encourage you to wait on the Lord? We live in an "instant" world. We have microwavable dinners, instant messages, and everything quicker and faster. Day by day, it gets easier and easier to become impatient and discontent. In relationships, it is no different. I remember when I made the choice not to date. I had gotten a glimpse of something big and beautiful. I pictured my wedding day and my wedding night and the more I dwelt on it, then more I wanted to be able to stand before my groom and give him everything. No leftovers. No past history. No baggage. No comparisons. Was it easy to wait? No, it wasn't. But was it worth it on my wedding day? YES, it was!

My sisters, if I could say two things to you I would say:

Wait on our God. If you are playing the dating game, ditch the boyfriend until the Author of Love sends you HIS choice. Do not take the writing pen into your hands, but let our Lord script your story. HE writes only the best love stories! Let Him have control. The Bible says that our hearts are deceitful (Jeremiah 17:9) and to guard it closely (Proverbs 4:23). Do not give pieces of your heart and body away. Do not throw around "I love You's" because each time you do, it becomes less meaningful to your future husband. Dear friends, I cannot stress the magnitude of the beauty that comes with waiting. It is worth every sacrifice, every tear of loneliness, every dateless night, and every moment you spend patiently waiting on the Lord. Do not doubt His faithfulness. Please, wait. And while you are waiting.....
Fall in love with Jesus. As you sit patiently and wait for your earthly prince to come and carry you away into the sunset (it still happens, believe you me!), fall more in love with your heavenly Prince, Jesus Christ. As you draw nearer to His heart, He will comfort you, strengthen you, and fill your life with joy and contentment....and the waiting won't be much of a big a deal anymore, because you will be totally taken up with Christ. The Bible says that the Lord will give each of us the desires of our hearts IF we delight in Him (Psalm 37:4-5). I encourage you to do so. Learn more about who He is and what He has done and will do. Read His love letter to you. Talk with Him. Lean on Him. Run to Him. Adore Him. The more your mind and heart is captured by Jesus, the more beautiful your earthly love story will be. And rest assured that no sneaky prince-wanna-be will be able to deceive you if you are completely focused on Him. Instead, the noble man of God that the Lord has in store for you will not only be captivated by your relationship with Jesus, he will lead you even closer to Christ! Sisters, please do away with distractions and petty come-and-go things. Fall into the arms of our ever-faithful, constant Companion and Champion, Jesus. You will never regret it.

What more can I say? The choice is yours, but I pray fervently that each of you will catch a glimpse of the glorious love story our God has for you.....and then serve your faithful King as you wait. It is worth it....and He is faithful.

Love,
your sister

Purity of Heart and Mind

2011-01-21T12:33:00.000-08:00

My first post of 2011. Sorry it has been a while, everyone.

Lately, I have been heavily thinking about mental purity. There have been plenty of books written, songs sung, and websites launched that encourages and promotes physical purity. And bravo! But here is a thought: What about the purity of the mind? What about the purity of the heart?

Of course, I am married and many may think that I am free from the "purity challenge." Quite the contrary. In fact, after marriage, purity of every kind is just as vital and important. Yes, I may be married and, therefore, "free" in my physical relationship with my husband, but discipline must still be practiced and self control is still just as important. I must be on guard against the enemy who would love nothing more than to smear the mud of sin on my marriage, my family, my testimony and my relationship with my King.

You may be wondering what type of tactics Satan can (and will!) use to try to destroy your mental and emotional purity. Here is a small list of things to stay away from:

1. Romance novels. I worked several years at a library in my hometown before I married. I remember so well all the many women - young and old - who would walk in regularly and exchange one stack of romance novels for another. What I came to discover is that most of the women who walked in and began a conversation with us, workers, would never speak positively about their husband. It was not uncommon for them to gush over some celebrity and make jokes as to how they would love to be their wife. I remember picking up a romance novel one day to see what all the fuss was about and was horrified at the explicit, frank, and anti-God language and story lines. What an abomination in the eyes of a holy God! I would encourage every woman - young and old - to abstain from romance novels....even most under the Christian label, as those can (and will) sometimes lure your heart and your emotions to some fictional character instead of toward your husband (even your future one). They will breed resentment and disrespect, both of which are sin. GOD created your husband, your father, and your brothers and though they are far from perfect, God commands us to respect and honor them. Keep your heart pure and reserved for only one.

2. Relationships with boy-crazy friends. If you want to maintain (or build) mental and emotional purity, sometimes it is most wise to keep yourself from being drawn into conversations and close friendships with girls and women who talk constantly of the latest heart throb. It can be so tempting to jump in and agree in their physical appraisal of "this-or-that guy" and then suddenly find yourself talking non-stop about who YOU think is the most handsome hunk on the planet. Now, married ladies, I will say that there is nothing wrong with bragging on your husband. In fact, it is needed in today's society. But do be mindful of how you brag and what words you choose. Be aware of your sisters in Christ who are not married and seeking to keep their focus on Christ. Do not tempt them to be boy crazy or dwell on boyfriends before the Lord's timing.

3. Secular Magazines. Picture this.... you are standing in the check-out line. Your eyes glaze over the magazine rack. What do you see? I'll tell you. You see pictures of women in skin-clad clothes and bikinis, you see headlines that talk of the latest "do's-and-don'ts" of sexual flings, and you see their advice on how to sizzle when you dress, talk, walk, and even sleep! How do you think reading these things affect your mental purity? Where will it lead your mind? If you are single, do you think it would make you dwell on physical relationships and tempt you to be outwardly attractive using their advice? If you are are married, do you think you will find yourself curious to try their techniques and hungry for more info to "spice" up your life? If you are human, then it most certainly will and that is exactly what their agenda is. I would encourage you to keep away from Cosmo, Elle, Glamour, Seventeen, Maxim, Vogue and the like.

4. Immodest dress. Modesty vs. fashion has always been a struggle. When we have curves, there is a desire in us that wants to flaunt them in tight, revealing clothes. But what are our motives for doing this? It could be to attract attention from males but, in so doing, we often lead them into lust, which makes us a stumbling block and the object of their sin. Another reason could be so we can feel attractive and desirable, selfishly thinking of our own beauty instead of considering the needs of our brothers and the enormous amount of spiritual discipline it takes for them to remain pure. Ladies, choose your clothes wisely. Many of the every-day clothes that girls now wear to school and church were the same type of outfits worn by prostitutes in the 80's. Statistics have proved that immodest clothing is one of the top 5 reasons girls become sexually active at an early age; many of them going on to becoming unwed teen mothers. Honor God with your dress. Cover yourself. Adorn yourself in grace and holiness.

5. Movies and Music. Okay, this one is a tough one. I am a girly girl who LOVES a good love story. But lately, I have been challenged in this area. What kind of movies do we watch? In terms of purity, do we own movies that have sexual scenes in them? Do we enjoy movies that promote the sin of fornication and/or adultery? Do we find ourself drooling over the actors or wishing that our husband "was like that"? Those are some questions to ask and tell-tell signs that what we're watching is not of God. And what about the music we listen to? Where does it lead your heart and your mind? What do the lyrics speak of? Is it glorifying God? Or is it glorifying a sinful relationship? Ask yourself these questions and prayerfully consider what God would have you to do. I would reccomend cleaning out your movie and CD shelf and your iTunes library.

Those are just 5 areas that Satan is using to destroy the purity of heart and mind in today's world. There are so many more! I have to be on guard against them. For the sake of my intimacy with Christ, for the sake of my marriage, for the sake of my family and future family, and for the sake of my testimony as a Christian, I must be careful to remain pure, not just in body, but in mind and heart as well.

Ladies, be watchful. Be vigilant. Be aware of the movies you watch, the music you listen to, the clothes you wear, the friendships you have, and what you read and put into your mind and heart.

As a wise girl once wrote, "If we can take every thought captive in obedience to Christ (easier said than done; it takes lots of prayer and diversion) than we're on our way to emotional purity." Amen and amen.

Proverbs 4:23
"Keep thy heart with all diligence; for out of it are the issues of life."

Philippians 4:7
"And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus."

Romans 12:2
"And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God."

2 Corinthians 10:5
"Casting down imaginations, and every high thing that exalteth itself against the knowledge of God, and bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ;"

Bridalplasty

2010-11-30T08:43:00.000-08:00

There is a new reality show on TV.

The name? Bridalplasty.

What's it about? Brides competing for plastic surgery.

Being an "all-things-wedding" lover, the title caught my eye. SO, I sat down to find out what the show was about. It took less than 10 minutes for me to change the channel. All in the name of "beauty" and offering "the dream wedding," the show is all about a woman's beauty coming from a fuller bust or slimmer waistline. It is about validating one's worth through being cut and "fixed." As if women need more pressure....

The women on the show compete by writing vows or planning honeymoons and the "winner" of each level is awarded various surgeries. I only watched long enough to witness a few chosen ladies who won a certain level and were moved up, leaving two women who had to return home, with no "cutting" in their future. Both girls cried over their loss, as I expected, but I remember thinking, "They are really very attractive. I can't imagine what they would want to cut on themselves." THEN my eyes caught two pictures hanging on the wall behind them. They were pictures of the same two ladies in beautiful wedding gowns - with a Barbie-like waist, colored hair, toned arms.... Very different from the true looks of the two girls left behind. Interviewing them, one by one, the first woman pointed to "her picture" and said, "I just wanted to look like that! That is how beautiful I could be! And now I'll never have a chance...." My blood boiled and my heart broke. Here was a pretty, average lady and her sense of self worth was so low, that she was on national television competing for a chance to change everything about her physical appearance. Her natural beauty was not good enough when held up next to mock photographs of some imagined model-like image of herself.

Our society has made beauty to be strictly outward when God Himself said that HE looks on the heart (2 Samuel 16:7). Have you, ladies, ever walked into Wal-Mart into the make-up section and just stood there overwhelmed? What about the shampoo and hair gel section? Or the face wash area? So many choices and so many targeted to "fix" puffy eyes, wrinkles, blotches, blemishes, age spots, freckles, and enlarged pores. Don't mistake me, there is nothing wrong with wanting to look your best or get rid of a few problem areas, but our society has made the outward physical appearance an obsession! The media holds up airbrushed models and tells us that we have to look like that - something that is unattainable, even for the model herself!

Hollywood produces magazines with the latest "how-to-fix-this" and "how-to-get-rid-of-that" in order to "keep your marriage on fire" and the number of lasting marital relationships in Hollywood is....well....I'll just say LOW.

The media has made beauty to be all about the outward adorning and has made marriage to be all about two things: sex and selfishness. Forget intimacy or deep bonding. It's now about the thrill and the fire of a biological act. Forget giving 100% all of the time. It is about getting your own needs met. Women are expected to show no emotion, be aggressive, be seductive little play toys, and never get wrinkles or stretch marks.

I'm on my soap box, I know. But how I wish that the girls and women of today would stop being materialistic and obsessed with their physical appearance. It is Jesus Christ who adorns a woman with beauty and HIS beauty lasts forever (yes, even well into your 70's). You can have all the plastic surgeries there is to offer, but if you do not have an intimate relationship with Christ, then your physical beauty is vain. Meaningless. And it will vanish quickly. You can have all the latest clothes, make-up, and accessories, and still feel worthless and unattractive. How I wish they would see that God did not just created us, He FORMED us. It is up to us to take care of our bodies and maintain them well, not to cut and tuck and change what He made. How I wish the girls and women of today would plant their high heels firmly on the ground and say, "MY beauty comes from my relationship with Jesus. MY marriage stays hot because we have the Author of Love in the center of our relationship."

A word to brides.... YES, it is your day. YES, I know you want to look BEAUTIFUL! But do not fall for the lie of this world. Your beauty comes with from Christ. It comes only from your closeness to our King. Perfect the inner beauty and the intimate relationship with Him, and you will be one radiantly beautiful bride!....no cutting involved!

Proverbs 31:30
"Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the LORD, she shall be praised."

It's Worth It All

2010-11-06T11:53:00.000-07:00

Years ago, my family sang a song that said,

It's worth it all to feel a fire that's burning deep within
It's worth it all to know I'm saved and I am free from sin
Just to feel His touch and know that He is coming back again
It's worth it all, it's worth it all

Though that song has little to do with sexual purity, I couldn't help but sing those words yesterday as I was scurrying around the house doing what housewives do.

I was going through my iTunes yesterday after and, to my delight, I found our wedding ceremony loaded onto my computer....so I watched it, reminiscing about that day. During the ceremony, my Dad, who performed the marriage, told my story to the 250+ witnesses gathered there. He spoke of my commitment to purity and all the trials that came with waiting and waiting....and waiting....for 24 years. As he ended my story, he said, "And aren't you glad, Kristen, that you held on?" I was! Just seconds from my first kiss and hours from my wedding night, I was so glad that I had waited for my prince; that I had saved everything for him and him alone. As I watched the video yesterday and heard myself sing "I Do," my song to my groom, I literally wept.

Grant and I have been married for 6 1/2 months and yet it seems like it has been years ago since I sat on my bed writing in my journal about how difficult it was to be patient. It feels like it's been years since I was a single girl, uninterested in any guy, yet hoping and praying that one day I would have a fairytale love of my own. I spent years saying "no" to kisses, trying to avoid the inevitable "Will you go out with me?" pleas. I spent years watching one friend after another get their heart broken, bash their ex behind their back, then hook with up another "perfect" person and....well....rinse and repeat. Years of hearing, "Oh, she's pregnant now. Did you know?" and "She and so-and-so.....you know."

Am I glad those years have gone? Definitely. However, I wouldn't trade those years for anything. They made me stronger, more determined to do things God's way. Yet, looking back, I remember the discouragement that came from time to time. I remember getting on my knees, asking God for forgiveness, and then strength to do things the right way. I remember crying and then hearing my Lord's voice saying, "Come to me. I am your Lover, I am your Prince...and I won't leave. Trust ME."

It was hard. It always is when you do things the Lord's way. Jesus said that His road is narrow. It is filled with hills and valleys, storms and sometimes vicious hurricanes. But oh....how sweet it is to walk with Jesus! To KNOW that you are in His will. Somehow, no matter how dark the sky may be, there is still a peaceful calm and a ray of sunshine when you are walking the narrow road of Christ, with Him at your side, guiding you, leading you, strengthening you, interceding for you....

That's how I feel, looking back. Did I face the storms of laughter, jokes, and condescending looks? Yep. Did I face the loss of friends, the headache of being unable to find a guy who truly wanted to be my friend, no strings attached? I did. Did I wonder if it was really worth it? Did I wonder if all the hard work would pay off? Yes.

*smile* But after 6 1/2 months of wedded bliss with a Godly, handsome, tender, passionate, romantic, strong, faithful husband with whom I will have a little one come April....I have to say, like that old song says, it's worth it all!

....it's worth it all.

Bridal Beauty

2010-10-25T13:36:00.000-07:00

Earlier this month, I had the joy of reuniting with some precious girls from a youth group. Many of them, knowing my purity testimony, asked about married life and I was able to tell them just how wonderful it is! We talked of purity, of relationships, and of the wedding day. MINE was such a beautiful and glorious day! Thinking back on it today, I began thinking of all the things I did to make myself beautiful for my wedding.

The night before the big day, I deep conditioned my hair. I polished my toe nails and scrubs the balls of my feet until they were smooth. I had already gone to get a manicure so my fingers and hands were ready! I washed my face and put on a facial mask. The next morning, I brushed, scrubbed, buffed, shaved, moisturized, and polished. I went to the hair salon and got my hair pulled into a beautiful curled updo. Then, I took care in putting my makeup on just so! I highlighted, I concealed, I blushed, and I outlined. I dabbed myself with perfume. I donned my gorgeous dress, slipped into my pretty shoes, and put on my jewelry. On our wedding night, it was no different. After arriving at our hotel, I went to the bathroom to change. While I was in there, preparing for our sacred and long-awaited night, I fixed my hair, brushed my teeth, and tried to look and smell sweet and desirable.

You may ask, "Why did you go to all that trouble?"

It seems like a lot for just one day. But it was THE DAY. And I wanted to look perfect for my groom. I wanted him to be captivated by my beauty. I wanted to be pleasing to him. Most any girl would agree that when they come to their wedding ceremony and wedding night, they want to look PERFECT!

With all that said, I have to say that we, as Christians, should do the same spiritually. I went to a lot of trouble for my wedding day. I had my hair done by a professional. I made sure my wedding gown was clean, pressed, and perfect. I took care to ensure my veil held no wrinkles. My shoes? They had to be clean and white, without a trace of dirt. On our wedding night, I did not throw on sweat pants and an old t-shirt. I adorned myself with a beautiful gown, clean and white. My spiritual state should be the same.

When Jesus Christ enters into your life, you are a bride! You are HIS! From that moment on, you have the desire to be clean, to be desirable, and to be beautiful for Him. You have the longing to always be perfectly groomed on the inside. To come before Him in old, smelly clothes with greasy hair, and unbrushed teeth is to show a careless attitude towards Him and your place as His bride. I am speaking spiritually. In my marriage with Grant, there have been moments where we have not looked our best. There have been mornings when I have been sick, and moments when my hair has been a mess and my clothes have been wrinkled. BUT my desire is to ALWAYS be desirable to him....and I put forth an effort. So it should be with our Jesus. I never want to come before Him and be unkempt and undesirable. I never want Him to see me dirty and unclean. Again, spiritually, I want to be BEAUTIFUL for Him! As girls, we always make time to make sure our hair is just so, our make-up is flawless, our breath is sweet-smelling, etc. We buy the straighteners, the curlers, the curling irons, the hair spray, the mousse, the gel, the styling creme, and the shampoo. We spend money making sure we have the foundation, the bronzer, the concealer, the mascara, the eyeliner, lipliner, lipstick, lipgloss, and lipbalm. We buy the razors, the lotions, the teeth whitener, the nail polish, the perfume, the clothes, the shoes, and the jewelry.

Girls and women have a built-in desire to be gorgeous on the outside. It is my desire, however, to be gorgeous on the inside; to make THAT my priority. If we, as Christian ladies, learn to, first, polish and perfect the inside, then that will seep forth and make our outward appearance radiant and stunning.

Proverbs 31:30
"Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the LORD, she shall be praised."

Psalm 45:11"So shall the king greatly desire thy beauty: for he is thy Lord; and worship thou him."
Psalm 90:17a
"And let the beauty of the LORD our God be upon us...."

Wait! I'm a Bride??

2010-10-05T10:26:00.000-07:00

The other day, as I was driving home from town, I thought back to my wedding day. I do that quiet often. Now that I am expecting and my clothes are beginning to get tight, sometimes I sneak a peak at my wedding dress hanging in my closet and wonder if I will ever fit into it again! But regardless if I will be able to zip it up or not, I will always love my wedding dress. The same goes for my wedding shoes (which were GORGEOUS, by the way!), my wedding veil, and my jewelry.

Here is a question: Do you think I could forget my wedding attire?

Would you forget your wedding attire? Would you forget your wedding day?

Sounds ridiculous, doesn't it? A BRIDE forgetting about her wedding day? A BRIDE forgetting about her wedding dress? Unheard of, right?

A few nights ago, I was reading my Bible and my eyes hit a verse that stopped me in my tracks.

Jeremiah 2:32
"Can a maid forget her ornaments, or a bride her attire?

yet my people have forgotten me days without number."

Over and over, I read and re-read that verse and I asked myself, Could I forget my wedding attire? Could I forget what a beautiful day my wedding day was? Or how beautiful I felt? No. Not at all! Yet.... have I ever forgotten, for one moment, about my Lord?

A sobering thought. It is a scary one too. Here, the Bible plainly says that the people of God have forgotten Him. Yet, a bride does not forget what her wedding gown looks like. How can that be???

I have to admit, I was convicted when I read that verse. I have been guilty of forgetting about my Savior. Not a day goes by that I don't think about my wedding at some point. When I look at my handsome husband, sometimes I think back to the smile he had on his face when we shared our first kiss at the alter. When I struggle to zip up my jeans, I sometimes think back to how easy it was to zip up my gown on my wedding day. When I see a wedding show on TV or pass a bridal party in town, I remember my own day. But at the same time, I have gone a day and never remember the great love of Jesus Christ, and the sacrifice He made on my behalf. I have gone a day (even two!) without stopping to thank Him for all that He has done. I have spent a quiet evening alone and never once pause and just bask in His goodness. I have forgotten HIM!!!

That verse in Jeremiah spoke to me and humbled me greatly. Never again do I want to forget about my Master, my Savior. Never again do I want to forget about all that He has done. I challenge you as I challenge myself to REMEMBER our King. Remember His love. Remember His commands. Remember His faithfulness. Remember His might. Remember.....

Do not forget, even for one moment, that you are His! His people, His creation, His bride...

The Single-Hearted Virgins

2010-09-22T07:47:00.000-07:00

Written by Thaysse Costa and found on the Set-Apart Girl website in their latest magazine, the following poem captures what should be the heart of every young woman.

I heard Him say, "Be single-hearted, My Bride"

The applause and shame of men despise.

Care not at all what they think and say,

Place thy eyes on Me: I will not delay.

Break at My feet alone thy spikenard jar,

I want thy heart from Me not afar.
Incline to Me thy intimate thoughts;
Embrace the narrow road that is rough -
For My love is far better than wine;
For thou art Mine, and I am thine.
Run to Me despite what thy enemies tell,
I have crushed them under My feet; they all fell.
My blood will cover thee in and out of need,
It will empower thee for multitudes to feed.
Examine My Word to find Me alone,
Each new day let me rule in thy hearts throne.
Be not afraid, I uphold thee in My right hand;
I am the One who will make thee stand.
My grace, love, and peace have already sufficed;
I AM thy Lover, thy LORD; I AM thy Christ.
Deny thy interests, give Me thy life;
I long to make thee a gracious wife.

The single-hearted virgins were bought with a price;
Their affection and interest are for the Risen Christ.
With undivided heart they delight in His name,
To be His and His alone they are not ashamed.
In Adullam's cave they have joined their King;
In being hunted and despised for His sake they rejoice and sing.
There they are made ready for the fight,
Being freshly anointed with the captain's might.
In pain and purging they cleave to the Spirit's Sword;
In the Lord's strength and grace they march forward.
The Lamb's righteousness is their cloak,
And only in the cross they dare to boast.
They become Mary sitting at Jesus' feet,
And following only where the Spirit leads.
With effectual fervent prayers they intercede;
Building up broken walls, standing for the least.
They do not indulge under a chapel's bell,
But spend themselves within an yard from hell.
In the bedrocks of unchangeable truth they stand
Immovable and shielded by the Almighty Hand.
And this is the single-hearted virgins' cry:
"Give the glory due to the Triune GOD on High!"

Like a Bride Adorned

2010-08-31T10:05:00.000-07:00

A few days before my wedding, my parents presented me with a special gift: a beautiful white gown and robe for my wedding night. Along with their present was a small card. When I opened to read what they had written inside the card, all I found was this:

Revelation 21:2
Love,
Dad and Mom

It didn't take long for me to find the verse which says, And I John saw the holy city, new Jerusalem, coming down from God out of heaven, prepared as a bride adorned for her husband.

....as a bride adorned for her husband.

I had read that verse many times throughout my life, but that night, just a few short days until my wedding, that verse took on a whole new meaning.

When I think of the new Jerusalem that will come down from Heaven one day, I think of beauty. Splendor. Glory. Shining, glistening, gleaming.... When the holy city comes down, it will be a sight to behold! And the Bible likens that glorious picture to a bride adorned for her husband. What a comparison!! Before that night when my parents presented me with their special gift, I had always thought that the bride's adorning the verse spoke about was her wedding gown. And it could very well be. However, after I received that beautiful evening gown and robe, I began to really dwell on that verse.

....as a bride adorned for her husband.

For her HUSBAND. Not a crowd of people. Not her friends or family, but for her husband. To me, that speaks of privacy. I think of intimacy. Sacred. Mysterious. I think of purity. How should a bride be adorned for her husband? She should be adorned in holiness, in glory. She should be adorned in beauty, but it should be a beauty that is reserved for her husband only. Far too many women refuse to protect that which is pure and sacred. In our culture, girls and women flaunt their bodies and reveal themselves to everyone around them. Then when they adorn themselves for their husband on their wedding night, they are giving him a view of their beauty that has, usually, already been glimpsed, if not completely seen, by many others. Sadly, the adorning that most choose is NOT likely to be compared to the holy city of Jerusalem in all its splendor and glory.

If I could encourage you girls, ladies, and brides out there to do one thing, I would encourage you to adorn yourself honorably for your husband. Keep what is sacred, SACRED. Keep what is mysterious under wraps. Make up your mind to refuse to dress or act unholy. My prayer for each of you is for you, as a bride, to be holy and clothed in splendor....like that holy city of God we will see one day.

As He Rejoices

2010-08-27T12:28:00.000-07:00

Isaiah 62:5
For as a young man marrieth a virgin, so shall thy sons marry thee: and as the bridegroom rejoiceth over the bride, so shall thy God rejoice over thee.

As the bridegroom rejoices over his bride...so shall God rejoice over you.

That jumps out at me and gives me such girlish delight! As a girl, as a woman, as a lady, and as a bride, you LONG for your love to rejoice over you. You long for him to gaze at you in awe. When he speaks of you, you want his words to drip honey! Being rejoiced over by a prince is every girl's desire!

When I fell in love with Grant, I wanted him to love me with a love that could not be matched by any other human. I wanted him to be anxiously excited when he spoke to me or when he saw me. I wanted him to REJOICE over me. And he wanted to be rejoiced over as well.

When I married Grant, that feeling exploded and began to rise to a much higher level. I not only wanted him to rejoice over seeing me or speaking with me, but I wanted him to rejoice when he came home to me at the end of the day, when he tasted dinner made specially by me for him. I wanted him to rejoice over me as I kept house, cooked, cleaning, washed, and ironed. He is my bridegroom and I want to always be worthy of his rejoicing; of his delight. And I want to rejoice over him too!

"...as the bridegroom rejoiceth over the bride..."

Now, let us look at the second part of that verse, so shall thy God rejoice over thee. That brings me to a whole new dimension! So shall GOD rejoice? When I think of it, I have to ask myself if I have done anything that merits the LORD God to rejoice over me? Have I? To be honest, no.

We often wrap ourselves so deep into earthly relationships that we become completely oblivious to the need of our heavenly romance. We long for our fiance' or husband and we work hard to be worthy of him and have him fall more in love with us every day. But rarely do we work to make ourselves a holy, pure, empty vessel that Christ desires us to be. If we would spend as much time and effort and energy every day beautifying ourselves spiritually, and making the temple of God (us!) a more pleasant, clean, and holy place for our heavenly Bridegroom to dwell, then our God would definitely rejoice over us more than we could fathom! Let us "seek Him first" and make our relationship with Him our first priority. Let us desire to be desirable by Him. Let us long to be rejoiced over by HIM. Our earthly marriage is VERY important, but always remember that our Heavenly Marriage is the foundation for it all.

Praise God From Whom ALL Blessings Flow

2010-08-27T12:27:00.000-07:00

It's funny how I have been married for four months and a part of me still feels like a bride. I hope I never lose that feeling! I hope 20, 30, 40, and 50 years from now, I still feel like a bride on her honeymoon. I know I have said it many times, but I have to say it again. I love being married!

I am a daughter. I am a sister. I am a granddaughter. I am a niece. I am a cousin. I am a friend.

I am a WIFE! ....and this spring I will become something else. I will become a mother!

God Almighty has seen fit to touch me intimately and physically and has blessed my womb with a life! A soul! A little one. I am beyond humbled. I am 7 weeks into my pregnancy and I covet your prayers. Please pray that this little life will be a mighty prince or princess for the Kingdom of Christ!

In closing, all I can say is:

Praise God from whom ALL blessings flow!

Psalm 127:3-5
Lo, children are an heritage of the LORD: and the fruit of the womb is his reward. As arrows are in the hand of a mighty man; so are children of the youth. Happy is the man that hath his quiver full of them: they shall not be ashamed, but they shall speak with the enemies in the gate.

We've Been Featured!

2010-08-12T07:54:00.000-07:00

Ashley over at Bride on a Budget has featured Grant's and my wedding!

Please go check it out!

To Top It Off!

2010-08-06T08:28:00.000-07:00

Did I ever blog about my cake topper?

.... I didn't think so.

In my post about our wedding cake, I likened the cake to salvation. Salvation is sweet! Salvation is amazing! It is the precious blood of Christ which redeemed us from sin! While thinking about our cake topper, I suddenly had a great revelation!

My God did not just give me salvation, but also SO much more!

Think about it. Salvation would have been enough. God Himself, in all His divine glory came down to this earth. He put on flesh, He lived on earth, He endured trials and temptations. He suffered. He was refused and rejected. He died. And He did it all for me....and for you. He gave all that He was to redeem us from our sin. We did not deserve His salvation. We did not deserve His love or grace, or His pardon. We surely did not deserve His sacrifice. Yet He gave it....and then He gave more!!

When we accept Him as our Lord and Savior, He not only comes into our hearts and lives and SAVES us, but then He blesses us, directs us, convicts us, teaches us, strengthens us, comforts us, and enables us to do His will. Talk about icing on the cake!

Galations 5:22 and 23 says that the fruit of the Spirit (meaning, the proof and evidence of having Him in our lives) is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, meekness, and temperance. James 1:5 says that if we lack wisdom, to ask God in faith, and He will give it liberally (meaning, as much as we need!). Wow! All those wonderful gifts given freely by Jesus to those who call upon Him.

In a wedding, there is a cake. It is beautiful and sweet to the taste - like Salvation. But in most weddings, there is also a cake topper; an added touch on the top. It may be flowers, a figurine of the bride and groom, a crystal shape or, like my husband and I, a monogram letter. It is a personal touch to the cake that is already wonderful and perfect! So it is spiritually. Salvation is already there, waiting to be "eaten"....and to top it off, our great King also places a personal, added touch on top! Blessings! Gifts! ....and more!

Ephesians 1:3"Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who hath blessed us with all spiritual blessings in heavenly places in Christ."

Ephesians 3:20
"Now unto him that is able to do exceeding abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that worketh in us."

More of Him

2010-07-29T12:53:00.000-07:00

This song has been on my heart all day. Grant and I asked our dear friends to sing the following song at our wedding. Written and recorded by Eric and Leslie Ludy, you can listen to and download the song on iTunes.

In a marriage, it is easy to demand that things be all about us. More of "my way," more of "my needs met" and "my likes." But in reality, for a marriage to flourish and thrive, it should be ALL about more of Jesus.... in life, and in marriage.

I stand before you nowWith a sacred vow
To love you for a lifetime
To give all my heartBut there's One who's there
Where my love will fail
And He is all that I'm not

So now I must decrease
Usher His full glory in
May there be less of me and more of Him

When you see me
May you see reflections
Of One who's perfection won't end
When you hold me
May you feel the touch of
The One who loves much more
Than I can comprehend
When you fall more in love with me
May you fall more in love with Him

As the years go by
May I always try
To draw you closer to your one true destinyMy love for you is great
But it's just a taste
Of what's waiting in eternity

So now I must decrease
Usher His full glory in
May there be less of me and more of Him

When you see me
May you see reflections
Of One who's perfection won't end
When you hold me
May you feel the touch of
The One who loves much more
Than I can comprehend
When you fall more in love with me
May you fall more in love with Him

I Promise To Be There... Occasionally.

2010-07-28T11:21:00.000-07:00

My sister had a great status on Facebook this morning that convicted me, challenged me, and inspired me. I'll share it with you:

Does a wife have to write down when to talk, spend time or show love towards her husband on her calender? Does she talk to him just one time a week IF she feels ok? NO! Then we as Christians should NOT do the same to God. We are the Bride of Christ therefore HE is our husband. We should delight ourselves in Him. Lets not cheat on HIM with our pillow, FB etc or even OUR time. He wants to spend time with us.

How true that is! As a newlywed, I understand it in a new light. I would never even think of arranging time on my calendar to "fit" my husband in my life when it is convenient for me. I would never cheat on Him in any way with any one! I would never ignore him throughout the week and save the sweet looks, praising words, and gentle touches for one day of the week. I would never act like I wasn't married when around friends, family, or strangers. How could I?? I have given my all to him and have promised to be faithful and true forever. I LOVE being married and I love spending time with my husband. While he is at work, I spend the day making the house and home acceptable to him; cozy, clean, comfortable. When 5 o'clock rolls around, I'm watching the window, excited about seeing him after a day's work. I work to make it quite clear that I am married; I am taken; I belong to someone. Why would a wife act differently??

But my sister had a point. Too often we, as spiritual brides and wives, do exactly that! We ignore our Prince throughout the week. We go to work, go to school, go to parties, clubs, the bar, and then pop in Church Sunday morning and put on a grand show. We tote our Bible into Sunday School and read His love letter to us, without being moved or affected...much less changed. We sing the hymns, nod our heads during the sermon, then go home. And as we reach our house, the Bible is put back on the shelf where it will remain for the rest of the week. We do not pray (unless we need something). And we assume that our Groom is satisfied and pleased with our "time." God, forgive us. We cheat on Him. We are unfaithful to our God, putting everything in the world above Him. We will sleep late and skip Church, we will read books and magazines more than our Bibles. We will spend more time watching TV, surfing the internet, or out with friends than in the presence of God, praying. We use our talents and gifts to glorify ourselves instead of glorifying Christ and leading others to Him. When we asked Him to save us and come into our lives, we relinquished our rights. We gave Him all. And quite often, we take it back later. When we want our way, instead of His, we break our promise to serve Him, obey Him, follow Him, and love Him. We do what is convenient for us, instead of what is commanded of us.

We have made it too easy to forget and ignore our Bridegroom. We don't want Him "in the way" of our activities and plans, because...well, let's face it, He may not like them. Yet, we claim to be His servants, His children, His BRIDE.

I am guilty, too, of not giving my Heavenly Love as much time as my earthly love. I am guilty of being more excited to see my husband, than spending time in the presence of my King.

So it is time to change. It is time to re-evaluate. It is time to repent.

If you are human, like me, then you are probably in the same shoes as I am. So join me in giving Jesus, our Heavenly and Mighty Prince, our ALL...every day, every hour, every moment.

Revelation 19:7 -
"Let us be glad and rejoice, and give honour to him: for the marriage of the Lamb is come, and his wife hath made herself ready."

Eternally Newlyweds

2010-07-21T08:55:00.000-07:00

Can I just say right now that I loooooooooove being married?

Can I say that? Good. Thank you. ;)My hubby and I have been married for a grand total of 95 days! ....(which, sadly, is a record these days)

We are still newlyweds. *bats eyes*

Actually, Grant and I have both made a decision that we will work to have the "honeymoon" feeling for the rest of our lives. We want to always be so totally in love that, 20 years from now, people will think we are just newly married. Tomorrow, we want to be more in love with each other than we are today. It takes work. It takes effort. There have been days when we have grown lazy. But all in all, I have to say that we feel more blessed, more excited, more passionate, and more in love today than on our honeymoon. So far, so good!

You know, as a bride and as a wife, I want to feel like a newlywed for the rest of my life. But here is a thought: Should we not feel the same way about our Heavenly Husband? Think about it. Go back in time. When you first asked Jesus to come into your heart and life and change you, make you whole, make you new, and SAVE you, didn't you feel just wonderful?! :) Didn't you feel light and happy and completely at peace? Didn't you feel like you could walk on air? Didn't you want to shout, laugh, and cry all at the same time? You were COMPLETELY in love! You were a spiritual newlywed. :) Why is it that we lose that newlywed feeling towards our Love? Why do we get lazy in our attempt to fall more and more in love with Christ? Why are we slack? Why are we selfish and indifferent? Why do we act so deeply amazed by Him when we walk in Church, but then leave and ignore Him the rest of the week? Or call to Him when we are in trouble? Is that the reason we "married" our Heavenly Prince? Would any wife marry her husband only to give him attention one day a week? Call him only when she needs help changing a flat tire?

It is a profound thought. A convicting one.

As a wife, I adore my husband! Though he is human, I look at him as my Prince and my Knight. I want to be with him all the time. I watch the window and run and fix my hair as 5 o'clock rolls around each evening, when I know he is about to come home from work. I want his thoughts and opinions about everything. I want his approval. I want him pleased. So why are we not the same (and more!) with the King of Kings? Why do we not want to be in His presence every moment of every day? Why do we not anxiously and excitedly long for Him to come to us? Why do we not rid ourselves of the spiritual stench and sloppiness in our lives for Him? Why do we not seek Him in our every decision? Why do we ignore His commandments and standards and rules for our living? Why do we not care about pleasing Him?

I would have to say that we, as spiritual brides, are pretty rotten wives sometimes. We need to get our perspective corrected and work a bit harder. I don't know about you, but I want my relationship with my Heavenly Love to be MORE blissful and amazing every day. I want to be eternally newlyweds with my Jesus! Just as I long and work to keep the passion alive with my husband, I should work harder and long more strongly to keep the Heavenly Honeymoon spirit alive and well in my relationship with Christ.

....it's something to think about.

John 15:9 -
As the Father hath loved me, so have I loved you: continue ye in my love.

Song of Solomon 8:6a, 7a -
Set me as a seal upon thine heart, as a seal upon thine arm: for love is strong as death...Many waters cannot quench love, neither can the floods drown it:...

Jeremiah 31:3 -
The LORD hath appeared of old unto me, saying, Yea, I have loved thee with an everlasting love: therefore with lovingkindness have I drawn thee.

Pamela's Prayer

2010-07-08T09:34:00.000-07:00

If you have never seen the inspirational movie, Pamela's Prayer, than you are definitely missing out! My parents discovered this movie several years ago and it was such an encouragement to me in my commitment to chaste living.

This is the trailer of a great and powerful movie that promotes purity and saving everything for marriage. Based on the true story of Pamela Bucklin, it is about a girl who obeys her earthly and heavenly father, and who pursues righteous and pure living....including saving her first kiss for her wedding day. Check it out and be inspired!

Man WANTED!!

2010-07-06T14:52:00.000-07:00

One of my dear friends wrote the following years ago and I love it! Let it be an encouragement for all you single ladies out there to 1) make your standards Godly, 2) set your standards high, and 3) trust your future with our God, the King.

Man Wanted: Must be sensitive, honest, understanding, and caring. Must have good relationship with the Lord and be of high moral character. Must be strong for carrying overloaded luggage and must be brave in order to provide protection from bugs and rodents. Must have a working knowledge of the art of giving compliments and must know a good place to buy flowers. Most importantly, must possess large amounts of love to be given freely and often.

"Sometimes my friends ask me how I found a wonderful guy like you.
I tell them I placed a want ad with God."
(Courtesy of Rachelle Wardell)

Warrior Bride

2010-06-29T07:51:00.000-07:00

I am SUCH a girly girl. I will admit it.

I adore bubble baths, candles, fluffy pillows, weddings, flowers, and chocolate; I love shoes, old films, dresses and, the tell-tale sign of any girly girl - the color pink. I love being a girl, being a bride, and being a wife. Books, movies, music, letters, or a hug can move me to tears at the drop of a hat.

But I am also tough. I can roll up my sleeves and get dirty. I can fight for justice and I want to defend the weak. I'm a girl, but I can wage war. ....and that is as it should be.

The Bible says that we, as Christians, are at war. This world is not a peaceful place, especially for a Child of the King. We are constantly battling Satan and his demons as we wrestle and push and fight to live out the Christian life in a world consumed with the lust of the flesh. We are continually at war with our own flesh, fighting to put it to death every moment of every day. And it is hard.

But we must FIGHT!! The Bible tells us, as Christians, to put on His heavenly armor and go to war with sin and self.

Ephesians 6:10-17
"Finally, my brethren, be strong in the Lord, and in the power of his might. Put on the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil. For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places. Wherefore take unto you the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand. Stand therefore, having your loins girt about with truth, and having on the breastplate of righteousness; And your feet shod with the preparation of the gospel of peace; Above all, taking the shield of faith, wherewith ye shall be able to quench all the fiery darts of the wicked. And take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God."

1 Timothy 6:12
"Fight the good fight of faith, lay hold on eternal life, whereunto thou art also called, and hast professed a good profession before many witnesses."

As a bride, we fight a lot of things. Stress, fatigue, distraction, irritability, and the occasional overwhelming urge to scream! With all the decisions to make, people to inform and direct, the things to buy, it is hard to keep our cool and remain calm, composed, and graceful. As Christians, it is much the same. We fight Satan and all the fruits of the darkness and of this world. It is hard to die and let Jesus live our lives through us. It is hard to remain kind, loving, longsuffering, patient, gentle, and meek. That is the war we are in! And, believe me, it is an intense war!

So, my words to you (and myself as well).......

BE WARRIOR BRIDES!!

Lead Me

2010-06-28T09:50:00.000-07:00

A great song of perspective to all those husbands and fathers out there.

Don't Blanket My Fairytale!

2010-06-23T11:06:00.000-07:00

Let's face it. As girls and women, we LOVE a good fairytale. Be honest. We love Cinderella, Snow White and Sleeping Beauty. We love their stories, we love their voices, we love their gowns...and we love their "happily ever afters."

Since I have been married, people have asked me about married life.

How is it?

What's it like?

Is it soooooo dreamy??

People have asked me if it is everything I imagined it. My answer? More. It is far more than I ever expected. It is wonderful and beautiful and fun and precious.... But it is also hard work.

When Grant and I were engaged, we were both shocked at the amount of people who threw wet blankets on our romance. It seemed like every time we turned around, there was another piece of marital advice like...

Enjoy it now. It won't be like that for long. *sweet smile*

Honey, marriage isn't ALL it's cracked up to be.

You just wait until after the honeymoon. Reality will hit hard.

Now... just don't expect it to be perfect, okay?

How's that for encouragement? Sadly, the wet blankets we received were from married people...Christian married people.

If I could give a bit of encouragement to upcoming brides and grooms, I would say,

MARRIED LIFE IS WONDERFUL!!!!

BUT!.... it's hard work.

Some people (like our wet blanket throwers) believe that once you say "I Do" the fairytale begins!...and that is partly true. But then they begin to experience the busy and hectic life of marital bliss and, unfortunately, what usually follows is a failure to communicate, a lack of interest, apathy, boredom, and downright laziness! Then they become a spokesperson for "Reality".....believing it their duty to blanket the fairytale dreams of others. But what many married (and non-married) people fail to realize is that you CAN have a fairytale romance! It IS possible!....BUT you must work for it. It will not be handed to you on a silver platter. It does not come with the marriage licence or the ring. Fairytale love is built, not simply given. You have to work through conflicts, work through problems and decisions, and work in the mud of your own selfishness. You have to get your hands dirty. You must make the effort and put in 110%, not just 50% like many believe. You have to put your mind to having a fairytale love. It is attainable....but you must do your part.

So, for all your brides out there, CONGRATULATIONS!!! A fairytale love that you could never imagine is at your fingertips. Roll up your sleeves, straighten your veil - and GO AFTER IT!!

A Cord of Three

2010-06-21T11:35:00.000-07:00

Ecclesiastes 4:12b -

"....and a threefold cord is not quickly broken."

One of the most important and significant things I am learning in marriage is this: you MUST have Jesus to make it work! When Jesus is in the midst, there is a great calm. When His presence in with you and your spouse, there is peace and perspective.

When Grant and I were discussing all the many details throughout our engagement, we struggled to decide what verse we wanted inscribed on our invitations. There were so many that spoke to us, one of which was Ecclesiastes 4:12. We have learned, even in two short months of matrimony, that a threefold cord is, truly, not easily broken. If the cord was only twofold - Grant and myself - it would have the potential to break in a horrible storm. Grant and I are deeply in love and our love is strong, but unfortunately it isn't unbreakable unless there is a third cord; namely Jesus Christ. With Him in your marriage, as a cornerstone and centerpiece, and in His rightful place, problems are quickly resolved and difficult situations are easily handled and worked through.

One of my favorite poems, blogged in a previous entry, puts it perfectly...."And not one marriage fails where Christ is asked to enter, as lovers come together with Jesus at the center."

Fellow wives and brides, always, always, always put Jesus first. It's easier said than done, but it MUST be done for your cord to be strong. Keep pressing forward and tighten up the thread as you put Jesus in the center.

Remembering "Bridedom"

2010-06-21T09:31:00.000-07:00

Today, I am reflecting on my season as a bride-to-be. I'm remembering what I call "Bridedom." Why? you ask.

It is because my sis-in-law is now engaged!!

Congratulations, Kristin!

The ring is on, the date is set, the bride is busy planning, and well.... you know the rest. :) Just getting over my own wedding, I am excited for my sister-in-law as she prepares for her wedding day.

The October wedding coming up is making me think back to my own engagement and wedding planning. I remember the stack of magazines cluttering my desk and my bed, I remember the planners, the notebook always stuck in my purse, the endless phone calls, the hours spent online, the trips to various department stores and shops...whew!! As fun and amazing as that season of my life was, I am just happy to FINALLY be married to Grant. The months of engagement are to be cherished. There is so much beauty in being engaged and understanding the significance of engagement and what it means spiritually. But engagement is not the destination. The destination is wedded bliss! It is sharing your life with your spouse. It is learning to be more selfless, giving, understanding, patient, etc. It is about family and leading your family closer to Jesus Christ. It is about learning more about the beauty of our "marriage" to Jesus. It's wonderful!...and I love it!

Anyway, congratulations Kristin! .....and all you other brides out there! Enjoy it! The best is yet to come!

Our Story

2010-06-15T15:02:00.000-07:00

IMPORTANT DATES:

* February 26, 2007: Grant first saw Kristen

* March 2007: Grant and Kristen officially meet

* June 2008: Deeper friendship begins

* October 21, 2008: Grant & Kristen make their relationship official and public

* December 27, 2008: Their first “I love you’s” are spoken

* January 31, 2009: Engagement!

* April 17, 2010: Wedding!!

HOW WE MET:

*** KRISTEN: It was March of 2007 and I never thought the concert that night would mark the meeting of my future husband. I remember pulling up to the place we would be singing and noticing, from the window, a young man helping my Dad, my grandpa, and my uncle unload the equipment. He was very handsome. I remember this one moment at the end of the service. We were up there singing a hymn and I looked down from the stage and saw Grant standing there with his eyes closed and his hands raised slightly as he as singing. It made an impression on me. I didn't know him, but I remember thinking, "Wow." After the service, he came up to me and introduced himself. We parted with each other's e-mail addresses.

*** GRANT: What she forgot to tell you about this first meeting was that I asked her out on a date that night. Her response was a nervous, “I don’t date”. I was thinking, “What does that mean?” But anyhow, I left with her home phone number. I was excited. She seemed like a wonderful, God loving woman. I knew that she probably really was a true “God” girl...

HOW WE FELL IN LOVE:

*** KRISTEN: I gave Grant my home number, instead of my cell. And I gave him my e-mail address. We sent a few e-mails, then connected on Facebook. What impressed me was that he stuck around. I had made it clear that I wasn't a dating type of girl and usually guys would disapear after a while, when they realized that I wanted to cultivate friendships. Grant didn't. We had fun exchanging forwards, e-mails, and Facebook messages. He called a couple of times, but I actually wouldn't answer!

*** GRANT: I was interested in Kristen, but not smitten by her! So we slowly began to exchange emails. I called her a few times but she never answered and never called back. I remember thinking, "What is up with this girl? She says to call anytime but won’t answer or return any of my calls. How rude!" But time went on and we exchanged a few emails here and there.

*** KRISTEN: I enjoyed the e-mails and the Facebook messages. They were never long, they were never intimate or personal. Everything centered around friendship, laughter and, most importantly, Christ. We would chat about revivals and witnessing and what God was doing and we would exchange jokes. I truly thought of him as a friend and a brother.

*** GRANT: I planned to ask Kristen out on a date again, but I didn't. I waited and waited and finally sent her a Facebook message asking her out for dinner. I got a lame response from her, when she said “Let’s just wait and see, okay?” This time I thought “whatever” and went on with life.

*** KRISTEN: I was so confused by how I felt concerning Grant. He had asked me out to dinner, and I rejected it....in a very strange way! Normally I would simply say, "No, thank you" and never think on it again. With Grant, I couldn't summon up the guts (or the want-to) to say a flat "No." So I said "maybe" or "let's just wait and see." I know it confused him. It confused me! But after a while, I began to seriously take a good look at Grant, as more than just a friend. He had been there as a brother, and as a friend, without pressuring me for a relationship or making flirtatious remarks. But it was obvious that his interest was there still. So in the early summer of 2008, I began to pray for God's will to be revealed in that area. I prayed for God's direction, His guidence, and that I would have the strength to go wherever He led.

*** GRANT: In May of 2008, Kristen and her family did a revival at my church. We hung out a little. I enjoyed being around her and her sisters after church. When the revival was over and after we loaded up their bus, I decided to ask her out for dinner yet again! And again I got a wild answer. I said, “Would you like to go to dinner sometime? Maybe some Italian food?”. She was like, “I don’t know, I'm really busy”. Frustrated, I said “Okay, just let me know.” I knew that she would not. Later that month, we came to her place for a bus fund-raiser. We got there the night before the event and she was riding her horse. So she and I went horseback riding for a few minutes and then she invited me to a movie with her sisters and uncle. After the fun-raiser the next day, she asked me to watch a movie with her that night *mouth drops open* Shocking!

*** KRISTEN: I remember being shocked that I even asked him to stay for a movie. But I did.

*** GRANT: A week later I came back down to ride horses on a Saturday with her. We rode all day, talked, and got sunburned. Then, the following month, I came back for a clean-up day at Psalms Camp and got to hang out with her again.

*** KRISTEN: I remember the horseback ride! We were so sore. That was the first time it was just the two of us, and I remember we talked about a lot of things! Bible, friendships, family, goals....we really got to know each other that day. And we were soooo sunburned by the end of the day! Grant and I really began hanging out in May of 2008. We went horseback riding and saw Narnia with my sisters and my uncle. I knew we were beginning to form a deeper relationship, other than just friendship, but I was in denial about the whole thing! Before I went to Brazil in July of 2008, Grant came over for dinner. I remember how nervous I felt, but that night marked a pivital point in our relationship. Before he left that night, he prayed for our trip to Brazil, and he prayed over me and with me. He also expressed his feelings in a deeper way and asked me how I viewed our relationship. I knew we both were attracted to the other but I was terrified and hestitant, so I said I considered us friends. I knew then I had to pray very hard. Deep down, I hoped he wouldn't walk away after I told him I considered us just friends.

*** GRANT: I asked her that night would she consider us as in a relationship. I definitely would not have thought of seeing anyone else. She said “No, we’re just friends...” I said “Okay” even though our relationship closely resembled something more. After she returned from Brazil, we started hanging out every weekend on Saturdays by going out witnessing with other friends. We saw several people saved. It was then that I saw a “sold-out” Christian woman; The type that you read about in Proverbs chapter 31. I loved to witness, pray, and serve God with her.

*** KRISTEN: When I came back from Brazil, and saw Grant a few days later, I knew this guy was not going away! Throughout the rest of the summer, I felt myself falling for him, little by little. I denied it to everybody, but everyone knew - especially my family. When we began witnessing together with some friends, that's when things really took off! When I first saw him lead a young man to the Lord, I was amazed. We quickly began building a deeper spiritual relationship. Witnessing together, praying together, seeing souls saved together - it was unbelievable! I fell in love with him through our shared ministry work. Serving God with him was a little bit of heaven on earth.

*** GRANT: As the summer ended and the new season of autumn came, I found myself falling very much in love with this woman. We continued to witness and hang out on the weekends. I loved it!

*** KRISTEN: When September rolled around, I was very much smitten. I guess we had been dating/courting all summer long, but we never made it public. Only our families knew, really. I remember telling a select few of my girl friends, whom I trusted, what was going on and how I wanted them to pray for guidence. I was very scared.

*** GRANT: In October, I knew it was time to move to the next step, so I asked Kristen one Saturday night if she would like to move this to the next level. I was so nervous, and so was she. She wanted some time and wanted to know what the “next step” would be. So we discussed it, and she said she needed time. I called her Dad and got his permission, and a nerve racking 3 days later I had my answer. On Tuesday on October 21st she decided that she wanted to move to the next step as well.

*** KRISTEN: I had had a feeling that Grant would be bringing up the next step soon. I knew I was falling for him, but was so scared of making a mistake. The night he asked me was completely nerve-wracking! I was shivering from the nerves. I told him I needed a little time to think and pray and he told me he would talk everything over with my Dad. That night, I remember Mom coming into my room and I spilled everything out and told her how I felt. I really wanted to take the next step, but I was so terrified! I spent a lot of time that night praying. I remember being up late, unable to fall asleep. The next day, Dad came to me telling me that Grant expressed serious feelings about me and wanted to pursue a courtship. We prayed and a couple of days later, I had a peace about it. So we moved ahead.

*** GRANT: Throughout the next few months we got to know each other on a new different level. We we’re falling in love, fast and hard. It was a wonderful season of growing in Faith and in each other!

OUR ENGAGEMENT:

*** KRISTEN: I did not expect anything! I remember thinking, the morning of January 31st, how handsome Gant looked when he showed up at my house. We went witnessing with my sisters and a few friends and then came to my house later that afternoon. Grant and I were going to meet his Mom for dinner but, before we left, Grant suddenly asked if I wanted to go for a walk. So we headed towards our Camp, where we normally go when we take walks. I remember him being unusually quiet but not once did I think anything of a proposal. I had told myself that it would be a few more months...or at least a couple more weeks! We walked down to my favorite spot on the Camp - the cross. From there, you see the Chapel and the lake. It's so peaceful and beautiful! When we got there, Grant stopped walking and turned and faced me. He grinned and said, "Close your eyes!" I remember wondering what was going on, but I closed my eyes and waited. When he told me to open them, he had a beautiful bouquet of lilies and roses in front of me. The first thing that came to my mind was shock. He had given me flowers plenty of times before, but it was never this extravagant for no reason. I remember thinking, "It's not my birthday....it's not Valentine's day.....it's not Easter...." I was smelling them and thanking him when he suddenly pulled them out of my hands and laid them on the ground. Then when he turned back to me, he took a deep breath...and then it hit me! My eyes got wide and I said "You're not...." and he nodded. I remember screaming and being in complete shock! He finally had to tell me to please hush so he could talk!! He knelt down and said some of the most beautiful and sweet words I've ever heard, ending with "I want to spend the rest of my life serving God...with you. Will you marry me?" And I said "YES!"

*** GRANT and KRISTEN were married April 17, 2010 at 2 p.m. in a beautiful log chapel in south Arkansas. Surrounded by friends and family and 250 guests, they exchanged their vows and exchanged their first kiss. They currently have several avenues of ministry and love to travel, spreading God's message of Salvation everywhere they go!

Our Covenant Vows

2010-05-27T12:16:00.000-07:00

Many people have commented about the vows Grant and I used on our wedding day. It was difficult trying to decide what we wanted to say. We wanted more than the usual "I do" vows (though we included those while exchanging rings) but we also didn't feel led to write our own vows....yet we could not seem to find the right vows that would fit the commitment we were making to one another....until the last minute!

Somehow, we stumbled upon the story of a couple's wedding and marriage and we read, with awe, their vows to each other. It took less than 5 minutes for Grant and I to say - "That's it!!"

Our vows were so important to us. In a time when the divorce rate is 50/50, even in Christian marriages, we wanted our covenant marriage to have a covenant vow, a Biblical vow. Our desire is to have a beautiful marriage relationship, that exhibits Christ and is a picture of all that He is. We wanted our vows to reflect what true marriage is supposed to be; the husband's role and the woman's role. We wanted our vows to be more than just a repeated promise that is broken daily by thousands all over the world, but a covenant vow to one another based upon the Word of God and Biblical principles. So, each part of our vows were taken from Scripture. So, below are our vows. I hope for all of you bride's reading, that it inspires you and gives you a glimpse of what marriage is really supposed to be. And for those of you who are already married, may it strengthen you and encourage you in your marriage relationship with your spouse.

GROOM:

I, Nathan Grant Lee, covenant before God and man, to you Kristen Elizabeth Lisemby to be your loving husband, and to lead you, to protect you, and provide for you in the fear of the Lord[1]. I vow to love you as my wife even as Christ also loved the church, to lay down my life for you[2]; to wash you with the water of the word[3]; to love you as my own body and to nourish and cherish you even as the Lord does the church; to render unto you the affection due you, knowing that I do not have authority over my own body but you do[4]; to dwell with you according to knowledge, giving honor unto you, as unto the weaker vessel, and living together with you as heirs together of the grace of life[5]. You alone will be my delight as the wife of my youth[6]. I will fight for you, for our sons, for our daughters, and for our household[7]. The Lord do so to me, and more also, if anything but death parts you and me[8]. I will be yours in times of plenty and in times of want, in times of sickness and in times of health, in times of joy and in times of sorrow, in times of failure and in times of triumph. I pledge to you my life as a loyal and faithful husband[9].

1 Timothy 5:8 ** Ephesians 5:25 ** Ephesians 5:26 ** 1 Corinthians 7:4
1 Peter 3:7 ** Proverbs 5:18 ** Nehemiah 4:14 ** Ruth 1:17 ** Hosea 2:19-20

BRIDE:

I, Kristen Elizabeth Lisemby, covenant before God and man, to you Nathan Grant Lee to be your loyal wife and to submit myself under your headship[10]. Just as the Church is subject to Christ[11], so I will be to you in everything. I will live first unto our God and then unto you, loving you, caring for you, obeying you, and ever seeking to please you as my earthly lord[12]. I will be your discreet, chaste keeper at home[13], diligently, industriously, and faithfully caring for the affairs of your household so that your heart may always safely trust in me[14]. If the Lord chooses to so bless us, it will be my delight to be your fruitful bearer[15] of children, and I will help you diligently teach them the commandments of the Lord as we talk of them in your house, as we walk by the way, when we lie down, and when we rise up[16]. Wherever you go, I will go; and wherever you lodge, I will lodge; your people shall be my people, And your God, my God[17]. The Lord do so to me, and more also, If anything but death parts you and me[18]. I will be yours in times of plenty and in times of want, in times of sickness and in times of health, in times of joy and in times of sorrow, in times of failure and in times of triumph, I pledge to you my life as an obedient and faithful wife.

Ephesians 5:22 ** Ephesians 5:24-25 ** 1 Peter 3:6 ** Titus 2:5 ** Proverbs 31:11
Psalms 128:3 ** Deuteronomy 6:7; 11:19 ** Ruth 1:16 ** Ruth 1:17

[1] 1 Timothy 5:8
[2] Ephesians 5:25
[3] Ephesians 5:26
[4] 1 Corinthians 7:4
[5] 1 Peter 3:7
[6] Proverbs 5:18
[7] Nehemiah 4:14
[8] Ruth 1:17
[9] Hosea 2:19-20
[10] Ephesians 5:22
[11] Ephesians 5:24-25
[12] 1 Peter 3:6
[13] Titus 2:5
[14] Proverbs 31:11
[15] Psalms 128:3
[16] Deuteronomy 6:7; 11:19
[17] Ruth 1:16
[18] Ruth 1:17

The Lord said in Ecclesiastes 5:5 that it is better never to make a vow, than to make one and break it.

The Bride Lives

2010-05-10T10:43:00.000-07:00

So hello everyone! I am finally back to the land of the living (or blogging!). For starters, the wedding was a perfect dream come true! (pictures here) The day was beautiful! The weather was perfect, our friends and family were there to cheer us on; Jesus Christ was our honored guest, and His presence was definitely felt there.

After much thought, I have decided to continue blogging on this blog. After all, it IS subtitled "Viewing a Wedding and Marriage from God's Perspective." So I will continue to blog, first recapping some wedding planning topics I never had time for, and then writing about the amazing beauty of God's love and salvation demonstrated in a marriage relationship. I have also been praying (and hearing semi-threats from various friends and relatives) and, after discussing it with my husband and family, I have also decided to eventually compile a portion of this blog, my wedding planning thoughts, into a book one day; creating a journal-like journey through engagement and encouraging all brides to see the incredible love of God in every aspect of their crazy season of wedding preparation. So pray for me as I, first, continue writing and, second, begin to eventually compile this blog together in a book.

Stay tuned for updates and recapping. I will slowly begin blogging here again as I get more and more settled in my new home and in my new life. :) Until then, stay helplessly and completely in love with our King!...because after all, you ARE the King's Bride, are you not? :)

Wedding Program

2010-05-10T10:29:00.000-07:00

I never got a chance to post our wedding program. May I say that it was absolutely perfect without sounding too bias? :) Because it truly was the most beautiful wedding ever. :) Below is the outline of our wedding program to give you lovely readers who were unable to attend the wedding a glimpse of our day. :)

PRELUDE

LIGHTING OF CANDLES
“Sunrise”….. Faith Lisemby

COUPLE’S SONG PLAYED
Theme from “Fireproof”

SEATING OF GRANDMOTHERS & MOTHERS
“Great Is Thy Faithfulness”

PROCESSIONAL
“I Will Get There”

WELCOME AND OPENING PRAYER
Evan. Jack Daniels

REFLECTIONS ON MARRIAGE
Rev. Joel Lisemby

SONG
“More Of Him” … Pam, Sarah & Zach Smith

PASTORAL CHARGE

SONG
“I Do” …….. the Bride, Kristen Lisemby

MARRIAGE VOWS / EXCHANGE OF RINGS

PRAYER

BREAKING OF THE GLASS / THE KISS

PRESENTATION OF BRIDE AND GROOM

RECESSIONAL .……….. “To God Be The Glory”

Wedding Pictures

2010-05-03T13:41:00.000-07:00

I'M MARRIED!!

2010-04-27T16:57:00.000-07:00

Song of Solomon 2:16
My beloved is mine, and I am his...

*** Pictures and news coming soon! ***

Bride on the Go!

2010-04-16T22:15:00.000-07:00

Fold wedding programs. Check.
Put up signs in designated places. Check.
Decide on parking. Check.
Decorate the wedding site. Check.
Decorate the reception site. Check.
Finish packing for the honeymoon. Check.....

Busy, busy, busy. A bride's work is never done.

I've heard it said that a wedding is the most stressful time of a girls' life and, after 14 months of planning my wedding, I am a believer! There are so many things to plan, decide, delegate, create, and prepare for.

Everyone has been working so very hard and I am forever grateful. God has done amazing things! He has performed miracles, using others to bless Grant and myself. This past year, I have definitely been reminded that my God provides! People have "mysteriously" showed up and have offered to do things we had no idea how we would do. God has blessed! He is good.

SO, tomorrow is the DAY!! THE day! Tomorrow is the day I have waited for and dreamed of my whole life. Tonight I will (hopefully) get some sleep. Tomorrow, I will get up, go get my hair done, come back and do makeup, then get dressed....and THEN (eventually) walk down the aisle to my groom! I will say "I do," I will pledge my heart, I will kiss him!!....and then we will ride off into the sunset and live happily ever after! It has been a long road to get to this point. It began when I was a baby when my parents began praying for me. And then the road led me through mountains and valleys. It made twists and turns and held forks in the road. But it eventually led me here to this place, where "forever" begins. The road will still go on. It has not dead ended, nor has it reached its destination. It has only paused at a rest stop. It has only turned on to "the Interstate" of marriage. It keeps going; it's not over yet. Tomorrow will only mark the BEGINNING! Like the sequal to a beautiful story, it isn't finished yet. Tomorrow at 2 o'clock, my life will take an exciting turn. My story will have a special twist! It's bittersweet, but SWEET nonetheless!

Well, I have to run....can't be late for my own wedding!

P.S. More posts to follow LATER! ;)

Wedding Prep and Rehearsal!

2010-04-16T06:34:00.000-07:00

I thought I would share a few pictures of this wedding prep craziness!

The bouquets turned out lovely! Thanks to Mrs. Shannon Meyers for doing such a marvelous job!

Placing lights in the chapel, decorating the reception area.....wooo!

The flowers for the gorgeous centerpeices!

Now, for the REHEARSAL dinner! It was absolutely beautiful!

The First Kiss

2010-04-15T07:07:00.000-07:00

So in two days, I will stand before my groom in front of our families, our friends, and witnessnesses, and we will share our first kiss!

Am I excited? Yes!

Am I nervous? Definitely!

Will it be worth it? No doubt! (that's a big yes!)

People have heard me talk a lot through the years about purity and saving your first kiss for your husband/wife. I've said countless times that I do not believe it is a command from God (saving your virginity IS) but I do believe that saving your first kiss is an honorable thing. A couple of weeks ago, I was sharing my purity testimony with a youth group and I said that we need to begin practicing faithfulness, patience, loyalty, trust, committment, and honor - NOW! It IS attainable. It IS doable. And it IS beautiful! We have been conditioned to think kissing is not a big deal. People kiss on the first date, when they hardly even know the person. Teen shows on Disney channel show young people kissing on dates, and next thing you know, they break up. Yet, if you think about it, kissing is quite an intimate exchange. It’s foreplay that arouses our desire for more. But more often than not, it is viewed as an innocent recreational pastime. So many believe that they can go from one relationship to the next, giving away parts of their body and heart while promising so many great things, and then be faithful to their spouse once they say "I do." But it does not work that way. Committment doesn't happen when you put a ring on your spouse's finger. Committment and faithfulness begins now! Today!

Now, many people take my convictions (and the convictions of others) assuming that it is some sort of rule or law. Quite the contrary. I made the choice alone based on my feelings, my knowledge, and my desires; Not to be legalistic or to prove anything, but only because I felt called of God to go a step farther. There is no such thing as going overboard when it comes to holiness and purity.

Does that make me better than anybody else who has kissed? No way! Absolutely not. We are all sinners and we are all guilty of impurity. We all have certian areas of our lives that are filthy and unclean. And we all, including myself, need to work on cleaning our lives up every single day.

Far too many these days scoff at the idea of going above and beyond the call of duty where purity is concerned. Many agree that abstinence is the way to go, that it's God's way, but then they go ballistic on you and try to give you their "real world" lecture when you mention things like "I'm waiting for Mr. Right" or "I want to guard my heart" OR "I want to save my first kiss!"

**On a side note, It's strange how, the majority of the time, those words come up when you're trying to do all you can do to please God and keep yourself from harms way...from abstaining from the appearance of evil. Odd how people make such a big deal and give you a hard time about doing everything you can to be as far away from temptation as possible. Ironic that they spend their time trying to convince you to LOWER your standards. Anyway....

Throughout my life, friends, family members, and complete strangers have rolled their eyes at me (and dozens more like me) and have laughed at "those poor, sheltered children." They have exclaimed, "That is unrealistc!" I beg to differ. Granted, you will not find the few in bars, clubs, wild parties, dances or in Hollywood. You will not see them in the midst of the popular crowd. But you will find them in that certain group of people who are just....different. You will find them in Churches, volunteering at shelters or nursing homes, active with their youth group, witnessing on the streets - you will find them, but not hanging out with those who live for physical gratification and pleasure. You will usually only find it in those who are laughed at, jeered, made fun of, misunderstood, and misrepresented. Sounds like too high of a price to pay? Well, if you are one of the few, rest assured you are in good company. And FYI - it's worth it!

Those who scoff and say it is unrealistic, I would love to introduce you to my many friends who bask in the "impossible" and glory in the "unattainable." I would love you to meet countless boys, girls, men, and women (of all ages) who, through the grace of God, have gone the extra mile. Those of you reading who are among them, BRAVO and keep it up! :)

Now let me say this....for those of you who have not saved their first kiss, do not be discouraged! As I said before, it is not a requirement of God (although it must never be taken lightly that purity IS a command). Regardless if you choose to save your kisses or give them away (or have already done so), it's not about "right or wrong." It's about a DIRECTION of purity. Some go above and beyond the call of duty, some simply just obey orders. Regardless of who you are or what you chose, STAY PURE - in mind, heart, and body. That's the command of Jesus. I would encourage all to save their kisses, beginning NOW, no matter what has been done in the past. But above all, save yourself! Guard your heart and body. Keep the sacred things sacred. Remember that you, Christians, are a relfection of the Most Holy God. Remember that you are His light, His hands, His feet, His mouth, His love.

Quotes by fellow nonkissers:

I want my kisses to mean something because with each kiss, I am giving part of my heart away, and I think a lot of times people don't realize that.

I have vowed to save my body, in -all- areas, until I stand by my spouse's side at the altar. Only then will I know exactly who I will marry, thus avoiding throwing away my first kiss to someone I will never marry.

I would like to challenge every person to save their first kiss until they hear the words, 'you may -now- kiss the bride'. Don't cheat your future spouse out of their deserved first kiss. And until I find my bride, I will save my first kiss for her. She will be the only woman I kiss....

I am 18 and have never kissed a guy. Purity is refreshing. :) I'm committed to keeping my mind pure as well as my body. It's not old fashioned, it's the way it was suppose to be. Satan has turned the norm into unthinkable in our society...

Leviticus 20:7
Sanctify yourselves therefore, and be ye holy: for I am the LORD your God.

1 Peter 1:15-16
But as he which hath called you is holy, so be ye holy in all manner of conversation; Because it is written, Be ye holy; for I am holy.

The Wedding Guestbook

2010-04-11T06:53:00.000-07:00

Personally, I think our guestbook is GORGEOUS!! I had looked at several different guestbooks at Hobby Lobby, Michaels, Wal-Mart and various other places but when my Mom found this one, I instantly fell in love with it! It's perfect!....very fitting for the style of our wedding.

A few weeks ago, when discussing the recent wedding purchases, I mentioned that we had finally bought the wedding guestbook. To my surprise, someone said, "So what will that represent?" To be honest, it didn't take long for the Lord to place a likeness in my path. While I was thinking of where to set up the table for the book that would be easy for the guests to get to, I was struck with the thought of another guestbook....a very important guestbook.

What is the purpose of the guestbook anyway?

Well, it is a keepsake reminder for the bride and groom of who attended their wedding. When guests arrive, they sign their name and take a seat. With all the hustle and bustle of a wedding, most times the bride and groom can't remember who attended the event so it's great to have a book of names to look back on and cherish.

So how is that spiritual?

What's the other very important guestbook?

Have you ever heard about God's guestbook? If you haven't, please keep reading! The Bible tells us about a very important "guestbook" in Heaven's courts. It is a book of names.

What names? Those who have accepted the love and salvation of Jesus Christ.

It is known as The Lamb's Book of Life. The very moment a person cries out to Jesus, asking His forgiveness and grace, and accepting His life for their own, their name is written in that great Guestbook. They are now invited to the wedding! Their name in that book means that they have a place reserved in Heaven. It means they are now a child of the Living God. Their name is in the book! It cannot be erased or scratched out. It's written with a heavenly, heavy duty permanent marker if you will! :) THAT is the other very important guestbook. And my wedding guestbook reminds me of it.

However, do not be fooled into thinking that you can slip into Heaven without signing in and enjoy yourself there. I'm sure there will be people who will forget to sign their name in my wedding guestbook this Saturday, but they will still be able to take a seat and watch me and my groom enter into a covenant marriage. They will still be welcome. But with God's guestbook, however, it does not work that way. No one can slip in late and have a place in Heaven. No one can get in without their name written in His book. And unlike a wedding where you can write your own name, in Heaven, Jesus does the writing. If He knows you, if He has called you and you have answered, if you have cried out to Him and accepted God the Son into your life, then your name is written by the hand of God.....not by your own doing.

I hope your name is written in God's Guestbook. If not, it can be! Don't wait. Do not hesitate. Jesus wants you to join Him. All of Heaven is praying you will come. All you have to do is call upon the name of God and accept His saving grace.

And then when the roll is called up yonder, you will be there.

Revelation 20:15
"And whosoever was not found written in the book of life was cast into the lake of fire."

The Last Minute Details

2010-04-10T13:28:00.000-07:00

COUNTDOWN: 1 week left!!!!!

My goodness, how time is flying by! There are so many details to take care of in these last seven days.

Clean up the wedding and reception area
Decorate the wedding and reception area
Finish packing
Get my nails done
Pick up part of the wedding party at the airport
Bring the flowers to our cake baker
Print the programs
Get pictures printed for framing
Put up signs at designated places
Get baskets for the programs and wedding favors
Pick up the corsages
Go for one last trial run for my hair
Clean! Clean! Clean!

There are lots of last minute details to take care of on the final week of the wedding. There are decisions to make like "Who will pick up the tables?" or "Who is taking so-and-so back to the airport?" or "What about parking?" etc. etc. etc. Details + Wedding = Stress. :) But it's all good and by this time next week, they won't even matter. All that will matter is that the bride and groom are finally married!!

My dear friend, Anna, loaned me a book early on in my engagement and its sole focus was learning to plan a wedding, while keeping God the center of your life. It inspired me to find rest and peace in Christ and not get caught up in the chaos and detail planning. And it has been so refreshing and it has helped remind me that is not all about the wedding....it's about the marriage!

Sadly, though, many people around the world today, when thinking of Christianity and Salvation, think only of the "details"....they think of good works, of Church attendance, of Baptism, or some other thing, and forget entirely the main foundation - which is Salvation through Jesus Christ! So many countless millions spend their lives trying to live well, be faithful to a Church, or get plunged in water in order to go to Heaven...yet they miss the point! They get caught up in the details, but when all is said and done, the details won't be the focal point. When they stand in front of God on Judgement Day, He won't ask about how they lived, what Church they went to, or whether they were baptized. He will ask, "What did you do with my Son, Jesus?" It's all about Christ! It's all about the "marriage" in other words. Baptism, Church attendance, and good works are FRUIT of Salvation. They are the beautiful resulting acts of salvation. It's proof. It's the details of the big event....just like the napkins, the parking attendants, the candles, and the wedding favors are all the details of mine and Grant's big event - our wedding! In a week's time, the color of the punch won't matter, nor will the fact that the programs were on ivory paper instead of silver. All that will matter is the vow we made to one another and the marriage that took place.

I pray those of you who are reading this blog will never be a "detail person".....getting caught up in the details and forgetting the "marriage." Trust me....when all is said and done, and when we leave this earth, nothing will matter except Jesus and what we did with His love, His blood, and His sacrifice.

When God Made You

2010-04-06T16:34:00.000-07:00

Have you ever wondered what your future husband or wife will be like? If you are like me, then you definitely have! I remember having all these daydreams about how my man would be, how he would act, what he would look like, how he would win my heart. I remember writing out a list of character traits I longed for in a husband. I dreamed of a noble modern-day Prince who would be patient, Godly, loving, encouraging, and gentle. I dreamed of a man of God who would storm the gates of hell and try to rescue the lost. I dreamed of a big smile and adoring eyes. I dreamed of strong arms to carry me and tender hands to hold mine. I dreamed of belly laughing with him and being able to walk around in sweats and no make-up and still feel beautiful in his presence. I even dreamed about sharing an intense love for mexican food! .....and my dreams came true!

Our story is a funny one (to read it, click here). I was always so confident that I would know immediately when "he" waltzed into my life. Did I know? Not at all! It took almost two years for me for me to actually see that the guy I daydreamed about my whole life was standing in front of me. Talk about an overwhelming experience!!

As our wedding day grows closer and closer, I've been thinking of my childhood. It's funny to think that Grant was five years old when I came into this world. When I was having my slumber party on my 10th birthday, he was learning to drive to school. When I was graduating high school, he was working at his job. And then, through God's amazing way of making paths cross, we met!....and the rest is history. :)

I've realized, as I fall more and more in love, that Grant is not just what I wanted. He's also what I needed. I got the Godly preacher and the sweet personality. I got the strong arms and tender hands. I got the brilliant smile and caring eyes. I got the fun, belly laughing moments. I even got the mexican food part! But I was also given so much more. I was given a guy who teaches me, who helps me see outside the box, who loves me in spite of my emotional idiosyncrasies, who lets me cry, and who encourages me beyond anything I ever dreamed. He's my best friend (and yes, it turns out that being best friends IS incredibly romantic!). I can't help but believe that when God made him, he thought of me. And when God formed me, he thought of him. He knew that Grant would be just what I needed. He knew that we would both grow in so many ways when brought together. He knew. :) And He is faithful.

Single ones reading....God IS faithful. He WILL give you His best. He can give you the desires of your heart. And He will give you exactly what you need! Trust Him. He knows. :)

Captured!

2010-04-06T10:04:00.000-07:00

Photography.

Let me give a shameless plug to the wonderful husband-and-wife team that make up Word Photography. Andrew and Heather Word did our engagement pictures and will do our wedding next weekend. If you haven't seen our beautiful pictures that were taken in November, please feel free to go check them out here. They were taken on my family's beautiful campground which is also the location of our wedding.

For me, it's a strange feeling when you are told by a photography to "act natural" while they snap away with a camera. Walking, talking, laughing, content, etc. They are trying to capture the real you. A fake smile will not do. A pose is usually stiff and uncomfortable. So they say, "Just smile! Be happy! Act normal!" Why? Because they want you as you! Genuine. Authentic.

Now, I hope you know where I'm going....

Photographers watch, then snap, and capture who you really are. And likewise, the world is watching and clicking away with their "cameras" - observing us, testing us, critiquing us. They want to see if we truly are who we claim to be. They watch to see if we're really committed to the God we claim to "serve." They test us. They try us. They want to capture us; to see the real Christian.

Luke 14:1
And it came to pass, as he went into the house of one of the chief Pharisees to eat bread on the sabbath day, that they watched him.

The world is searching for truth. The world is searching for something real and geunine. The Christians declare that we have it!.....and yet so often, the Christians are entangled in the chains of sin; talking the talk, but failing to walk the walk. The lost see that. The world, full of God-haters and mockers, laugh at it. And Satan uses it to his advantage.

We are captured every day, through the lense of this world. What do they see? When they bring their camera up to their eye and snap, do they capture a genuine Christian, full of joy and honor and holiness? Do they see a happy man or woman of God, as giddy in Christ as two newlyweds on their wedding day? Do they see the Gospel demonstrated and lived out in their life? Do they see a real Christian? Or do they find that the snapshot they took is a posed picture; an act; A phony and hypocritical person with a fake smile, an artificial joy, and a conterfeit Christianity....

Let it not be so!

Next weekend, when our photographers take dozens of pictures of me and my groom, they will capture us as we are - as a bride and groom completely in love and altogether happy! But my prayer is also that they, along with the whole world watching us, will see the joy of Christ in our eyes and in our smiles....and in our life. And I pray that is your prayer too.

Luke 6:7And the scribes and Pharisees watched him, whether he would heal on the sabbath day; that they might find an accusation against him.

Luke 20:20
And they watched him, and sent forth spies, which should feign themselves just men, that they might take hold of his words, that so they might deliver him unto the power and authority of the governor.

Colossians 2:8
Beware lest any man spoil you through philosophy and vain deceit, after the tradition of men, after the rudiments of the world, and not after Christ.

He Rose!

2010-04-04T07:05:00.000-07:00

"But now is Christ risen from the dead,
and become the firstfruits of them that slept."
1 Corinthians 15:20

HAPPY RESURRECTION DAY!!

He died for us to give us life, and to give us hope, HE ROSE!!

A Token of My Love

2010-04-01T19:44:00.000-07:00

I love the beautiful fact that rings are exchanged in a marriage ceremony. I love tokens!

Last week, I went and picked up Grant's wedding band from the jewelers. For those of you who don't remember, I blogged about my plan for his wedding band last month. I have to admit, I was so nervous when I walked into the jewelry store. I wanted the ring to look perfect! But when the sweet little woman walked up to the counter and handed me the band, my fears melted! It was exactly what I had hoped for. In less than three weeks, I will slip my beloved purity ring onto Grant's finger. The ring will be a token of my love. It will be a circle to symbolize "everlasting" which is what love and marriage should be; Never ending.

So now, you may see the finished product!

HERE IT IS!!!

I don't know about you, but I love it!

The heavens yield, the earth shall shield, and may our Savior sing the beauty, purity, and love sealed in the wedding ring. ~ Michael Rew

It's a Change

2010-03-31T09:13:00.000-07:00

With the wedding in less than three weeks, I am in the process of packing up my room. I've already boxed up half of my million books and most of my winter clothes. Now I'm on to the rest of my books, my movies, my music, my shoes, the rest of my clothes, and various other things. It's difficult, I will say, to go through years of pictures, school projects, AWANA awards, old Teddy bears and dolls and slowly pack up my memories and pieces of my life. It's quite a change.

Today, while I boxed up more of my belongings, I thought of how different my life will be one month from now. I will be a wife. I will have new responsibiities and obligations. It will be my duty to love and care for Grant, to meet his needs, to encourage him, follow him, and bring him honor with the way I live and keep his home. It's a change....but it's a beautiful one!

Life is full of changes. Birthdays, graduations, weddings, every phase of life has its share of newness. Every season brings about a new thing. Summer brings the heat and the excitement of family vacations, camp, and swimming pools! Autumn brings a chill in the air and colorful leaves. Winter brings the snow and the holidays. And then there's spring, where everything comes to life and is brand new. There are changes everywhere. So with spring in the air and my wedding two and half weeks away, I'm definitely thinking about change. But today, while packing and preparing to move, I thought of the biggest and most delightful change - salvation.

I've blogged about my testimony and the beautiful, redeeming love of our God throughout this blog, likening it to several areas of an engagement and a wedding, and it's funny how so much of the process is just like salvation. Having your man propose, getting engaged, sending out the invitations - there are so many reminders of God's goodness and grace...including packing up, moving, and beginning a new life with your husband/wife.

How? you may ask.

Well, just like my life will change when I say "I do" next month, my life changed years ago when I said "I do" to Jesus Christ. When I asked Jesus Christ to forgive me and come into my heart, my whole life changed. My desires changed. My responsibilities changed. My thoughts changed. I wasn't my own anymore, but belonged to Christ. I became His property. Every aspect of my life changed the day I was saved. And in like manner, every aspect of my life will change next month when I become Grant's wife. I will, then, have to follow him and obey him. My desires will be to please and make him happy instead of myself. My body will belong to him. My life will resolve around him and our life together. I will become his help meet, his companion....his wife. My home will be his home. I will leave my family and things that I am used to and am comfortable with, and will step out on faith and out of my comfort zone into a whole new world.

THAT is a change!

But it is a beautiful change! It is difficult to walk by faith and trust God. It is difficult to let Him grow you. He stretches you. He bends you.....but He doesn't break you. :) Change is hard. But change is good for us. It matures us. It helps us. It teaches us.

.....and change? Well, it SAVES us too!

2 Corinthians 5:17
Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new.

Goin' to the Chapel

2010-03-30T13:28:00.000-07:00

Going To The Chapel by The Dixie Cups

More The Dixie Cups music on iLike

Love Never Fails

2010-03-18T09:34:00.000-07:00

In preparation for my upcoming marriage, I have been meditating on love. Not the modern rendition of love where it flares up one day and dies the next. Not a feeling kind of love, but the choice love; the God love. The kind of love that is discribed in 1 Corinthians 13. Last year, a man in our Church put an interesting and thought provoking spin on the famous love chapter, and it showed me how much I lack the love that is Christ. I mean, really..... the love of God that is so great and so rich and deep that it could never be written across the great expanse of the skies.

What do I know of love?

What do I have that is even close??

What do I know of the self-giving, self-crucifying, self-denying love that is found in 1 Corinthians 13?

Very little, if at all.

I have learned something in my life, growing up with a great man of God for a father. We can do nothing in our own strength. We can only do what God enables us to do. And as for the great love that never fails, I am completely unable to exhibit it without the help and aid of the Great Lover that never fails.

And, personally, I'm glad He steps in when we can't do it alone. :)

1 Corinthians 13:4-8
Charity suffereth long, and is kind; charity envieth not; charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up, Doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil; Rejoiceth not in iniquity, but rejoiceth in the truth; Beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things. Charity never faileth:

Love is patient. Christ is patient. …Am I patient?

Love is kind. Christ is kind. …Am I kind?

Love does not envy. Christ does not envy. …Do I envy?

Love is not proud. Christ is not proud. …Am I proud?

Love is not arrogant. Christ is not arrogant. …Am I arrogant?

Love is not hateful. Christ is not hateful. …Am I hateful?

Love is not selfish. Christ is not selfish. …Am I selfish?

Love is not easily angered. Christ is not easily angered. …Am I easily angered?

Love does not keep a record of wrongs. Christ does not keep a record of wrongs. …Do I keep a record of wrong?

Love finds no joy in sin. Christ finds no joy in sin. …Do I find joy in sin?

Love delights in the truth. Christ delights in the truth. …Do I delight in the truth?

Love can bear anything. Christ can bear anything. …Can I bear anything?

Love never loses faith. Christ never loses faith. …Do I lose faith?

Love is always hopeful. Christ is always hopeful. …Am I always hopeful?

Love endures all things. Christ endures all things. …Do I endure all things?

Love never fails. Christ never fails. …Do I fail?

1 Corinthians 13:4-8
Love never gives up. Love cares more for others than for self. Love doesn’t want what it doesn’t have. Love doesn’t strut, Doesn’t have a swelled head, Doesn’t force itself on others, Isn’t always “me first,” Doesn’t fly off the handle, Doesn’t keep score of the sins of others, Doesn’t revel when others grovel, Takes pleasure in the flowering of truth, Puts up with anything, Trusts God always, Always looks for the best, Never looks back, But keeps going to the end. Love never dies.
– From The Message Bible

1 Corinthians 13:4-8
Love endures long and is patient and kind; love never is envious nor boils over with jealousy, is not boastful or vainglorious, does not display itself haughtily. It is not conceited (arrogant and inflated with pride); it is not rude (unmannerly) and does not act unbecomingly. Love (God’s love in us) does not insist on its own rights or its own way, for it is not self-seeking; it is not touchy or fretful or resentful; it takes no account of the evil done to it [it pays no attention to a suffered wrong]. It does not rejoice at injustice and unrighteousness, but rejoices when right and truth prevail. Love bears up under anything and everything that comes, is ever ready to believe the best of every person, its hopes are fadeless under all circumstances, and it endures everything [without weakening]. Love never fails [never fades out or becomes obsolete or comes to an end].– From The Amplified Bible

I Will Be Here

2010-03-15T12:06:00.000-07:00

While enjoying this beautiful song about lasting marrital love, I couldn't help but put it in spiritual terms.

No matter what may come about in our lives, Jesus, our Lord and our Love, will always be there. When we cry, He holds us. When we're angry, He speaks softly to us. When we laugh, He smiles with us. When we go through difficult or painful circumstances, He walks with us. On and on it goes! What great love He has for His bride....

Hebrews 13:5b -
"...for he hath said, I will never leave thee, nor forsake thee."

Matthew 28:20b -
"...and, lo, I am with you always, even unto the end of the world. Amen."

Love and Letters

2010-03-13T09:02:00.000-08:00

Thinking on Thursday's post of love letters and missing my groom very much while he is away, I got to thinking of the first real love letter I received from my man. It was late autumn of 2008 and a sweet-smelling envelope came in the mail. Seeing it was from my beau, I curiously opened it and found myself in near shock at what I found and what I read. What I found was rose petals and what I read, I will never forget.

Later that day, I sent an email to my dear friend with a strange, yet gloriously beautiful thought. Here is what I wrote:

This morning, I received an absolutely beautiful, sweet, Godly and completely lovely letter from my gentleman "court-er." :) It wasn't an e-mail...it was one of those old fashioned, completely charming letters you get in your mailbox!...which I love, if you can't tell. And it was filled with all those sentiments we girls love so much, along with a Godly type of love and romance. Perfect. :) I read it and I sighed and smiled and did the whole "fluttering eye" thing, but then it was like God struck me with something. You know how we go through life "knowing" a lot of things, but then one day we are actually "hit" with it...and then we REALLY know it?... *hopes that makes sense* Anyway, I felt nearly convicted with this thought: as giddy and girlishly happy that I get when receiving a love note from my earthly suitor, how much more happy and in love I should be when I read the words of Christ?...who is my TRUE love, my heavenly Prince. It really made me think. I hate to admit this, but sometimes I have read my Bible out of obligation...and I never read a love letter that way! That really made me think. The other day when we were talking, you mentioned that marriage gives a whole new perspective on the love of Jesus...well, I'm beginning to see it in a new light. Falling in love here on earth is soooo amazing. It's so exciting and nerve wracking and scary and perfect all rolled into one big emotion! But it makes you feel like nothing can possibly beat that feeling. And then, you are reminded of God's love. How He loves you SO much more than any human being ever could. That really startled me today. And for some reason, I felt I needed to share that with you!

Pray for me. I know you are, but pray that no earthly romance will ever become more important...or even more exciting...than my relationship with Christ. Pray that no matter how in love I become here with Grant, I will always have Jesus as the supreme Lover of my soul. I'm praying the very same for you. :)

Looking back, I can see that at that moment, God began doing a bigger work in my life in drawing me closer to Him and viewing Him as the all-consuming, passionate Lover of my heart. I still have quite a ways to go in my pursuit of Him, but how thankful I am that it was on that day that the Lord revealed such a wonderful thing to me! I have enjoyed thinking back to over a year ago, when my first love letter from my groom greeted me. And along those same thoughts, I have also thought back to the first time I was given God's love letter (aka - The Bible!). Growing up in a Christian home, I can't tell you the first time I heard the gospel. Perhaps it was while I was still in the womb! But I can tell you about the first time it hit me and changed me. I was five years old and with my family in north Arkansas. I was trying to understand the concept of a God that was bigger than anything my imagination could come up with...bigger than time itself. And suddenly, while the preacher was preaching, God began to speak to my little heart. I suddenly knew I had to believe through faith that the Jesus I grew up singing about, reading about, and loving was GOD. THE God. And He loved and wanted me. No matter how I misbehaved, He wanted me. I remembered the verses I had been taught...

...That whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.

...I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly.

...And I give unto them eternal life; and they shall never perish, neither shall any man pluck them out of my hand.

...For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved.

Needless to say, it didn't take long for the truth that was in my head to become truth that was in my heart and soul. It became faith. And since that day, Christ has drawn me closer to Him, showing me over and over and over again that He LOVES me! He shows me His love through the sunshine, through the wind, through the birds chirpping, the deer running, the flowers blooming, and all of creation singing! He tells me He loves me in the quiet moments...and in His indescribable love letter! He showers me with blessings and reminders that He is completely in love - with me! ....and how I long to shower HIM with the very same reminders.

Ladies....brides....fellow Christians....let this simple post and ALL of the world around you be a reminder of the King of Kings....and His love toward us.

The Best Dishes

2010-03-12T07:04:00.000-08:00

Have I showed you all our china patterns yet?? No? Well now, I simply must! :)

Grant and I picked a very simple, yet elegant pattern from Noritake called "Stoneleigh."

Flatware? As a gift from my grandmother, we have "Tabora" from Reed and Barton.

Crystal glassware? "Paris" from Noritake.

Now, there you have it! :)

My faithful few readers must be thinking, "Okay, HOW is she going to liken this to something spiritual? I mean, it's dishes!" I appreciate your confidence! :) Actually, I was suprised when it hit me just yesterday afternoon while finalizing a few china issues. What is china for?? I mean, all you need is everyday dishes to get you through. When do you ever even use your wedding china??

Well, in my family, we get out the china dishes when there is a special occation. Thanksgiving, a birthday, Christmas, graduation, etc. We take them out and place them neatly on the table when there is some sort of celebration. It's the very best. Sometimes we do the same thing for company. We don't want our company to eat off of the broken and chipped dishes, we want them to have the best!

Now do you know where I'm going with this??

It may not be much, but while I was thinking about china and how beautiful it is, I had to think of how Heaven gave us its very best when Jesus, God in human flesh, came down to earth. With all my sin and all my shame, our Heavenly Father looked down and decided to send the best Heaven had to offer to redeem me from sin. He did the same for you too! And when He saved me, He didn't just forgive me of all I had ever done up to that point.... He kept on forgiving! He washes me clean every day. He loves me unconditionally. He doesn't have a limitted amount of love or pardon or grace.... He doesn't give me the "chipped and broken dishes" - He breaks out the china! He doesn't set His table with paper plates and throwaway cups. He sets His table with overwhelming mercy, unfathomable joy, unspeakable peace, indiscribable love - THE VERY BEST! He gives the best gifts. He gives a human race that scorns Him, ignores Him, and spits in His face His very life. And He gives His children, who stumble and who question Him, the best of all that He is!

....I will never be able to look at wedding china without thinking of God's "best dishes" too.

Luke 15:22
"But the father said to his servants, Bring forth the best robe, and put it on him; and put a ring on his hand, and shoes on his feet:"

1 John 3:1
"Behold, what manner of love the Father hath bestowed upon us, that we should be called the sons of God:"

The King's Bride

My "Love Dare" For You

Searching For True Love

Our Wedding VIDEO

Excerpts from "I Kissed Dating Goodbye"

The Marriage Prayer

Heavenly Love Stories: Adam & Paige || pt 2

Heavenly Love Stories: Adam & Paige || pt 1

Romance, God's Way

Heavenly Love Stories: Jason & Katy || pt 1

Waiting On Him: Marli's Story

Waiting For You

God Hasn't Forgotten You

A Bride's Walk

Purity Lost

A Man's Thoughts on Modesty

10 Things I'm Learning in Marriage

While I'm Waiting

Waiting On Him: Sarah's Story

Skills in Singleness

My Wedding Remembered

Heavenly Love Stories: Jason & Jessica

Popular or Pure?

A Year of Marriage

A Year Ago

Heavenly Love Stories: Caleb & Anna

Heavenly Love Stories: Isaac & Rachelle

Let Him Write

Recommended Reading

Dear Sisters

Purity of Heart and Mind

Bridalplasty

It's Worth It All

Bridal Beauty

Wait! I'm a Bride??

The Single-Hearted Virgins

Like a Bride Adorned

As He Rejoices

Praise God From Whom ALL Blessings Flow

We've Been Featured!

To Top It Off!

More of Him

I Promise To Be There... Occasionally.

Eternally Newlyweds

Pamela's Prayer

Man WANTED!!

Warrior Bride

Lead Me

Don't Blanket My Fairytale!

A Cord of Three

Remembering "Bridedom"

Our Story

Our Covenant Vows

The Bride Lives

Wedding Program

Wedding Pictures

I'M MARRIED!!

Bride on the Go!

Wedding Prep and Rehearsal!

The First Kiss

The Wedding Guestbook

The Last Minute Details

When God Made You

Captured!

He Rose!

A Token of My Love

It's a Change

Goin' to the Chapel

Love Never Fails

I Will Be Here

Love and Letters

The Best Dishes